OK! Let's start things off with a scenario. It's Saturday lunchtime, and you're wandering round town.
You decide you want a sausage roll. You can either buy one at the new trendy food market, or at the family bakery in the indoor market.
If you chose the posh sausage roll, you are wrong.
This is the true and best British sausage roll:
Their natural habitat is Greggs or family bakeries in indoor markets, and they usually cost about 99p or less.
The true British sausage roll can be identified by its flakey, buttery, pastry, and soft, yielding "sausage meat" which is mostly rusk, salt, and spices.
Greggs sausage rolls, for instance, only contain 18% pork and this is absolutely as it should be!
But this magestic British snack is under threat from a dangerous imposter: the posh sausage roll.
Posh, aka hipster, sausage rolls are too large, too expensive, contain far too much actual meat, and too many fancy herbs.
As they become more and more common, they put our 99p beauties at risk of extinction.
£5.50 for a sausage roll? I'm over it all ready
We must not let the glorious 99p indoor market sausage roll go extinct.
