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    18 Calamities That Could Only Happen In Britain

    It's all kicking off in the UK.

    1. The horrible saga of the tea time that went tits up.

    2. The memorable time two horny birds held locals hostage.

    3. The hungry thief who wreaked havoc in the West Country.

    Karenpritchett / Getty Images /

    4. The long dark night of the morris dancers.

    5. When some shorts went missing.

    6. When the nation was horrified by a shameless heist.

    7. When a small furry animal turned nasty.

    Suefeldberg / Getty Images /

    8. The shattered wedding dream.

    9. The time that a slightly wet person lost it completely.

    10. The fateful time that a chair was destroyed.


    11. When this happened:

    12. The legendary tale of the "Keighley Fish Pie Ordeal".

    13. When havoc was wreaked by a noisy boy, 2.

    14. When a portal to the past opened in an unassuming shop in Norfolk.

    15. The mystery of the "poo thief".

    16. When the endtimes came to Waitrose.

    17. The terrifying story of the raging goats of North Devon.

    18. And of course, not forgetting: the extraordinary hunt for the giant penis.

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