1.
*someone starts having a heart attack* person: is anyone here a doctor?? vegan: im a vegan
2.
Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Give a vegan a fish and you'll never hear the end of it.
3.
When you're a vegan and haven't told anyone in 8 minutes
4.
Becoming a vegan because I hate animals and they don't deserve to touch my lips
5.
vegan: I'm a vegan me: typical vegan vegan: but you just asked me me: I know but I left that part out of the tweet vegan: my name isnt vegan
6.
Reporter: How do you feel about all this? Man in windshield: I just wanted to say I'm vegan.
7.
[aliens dissecting me] "Can u tell I'm a vegan?"
8.
MINISTER: Do you take this man to be your husband? BRIDE: I do MINISTER: Do you take this woman to be your wife? VEGAN GROOM: I’m a vegan
9.
[getting stabbed] "I'm a vegan"
10.
[RUNS THRU AIRPORT TO STOP GIRL FROM GETTING ON PLANE] Me: Wait, I have to tell you something! Her: Oh wow! I knew you lov- Me: I'M VEGAN
11.
me: made vegan tacos everyone: VEGANS NEVER SHUT U P ABOUT BEING VEGAN me: made tacos everyone: ARENT U VEGAN? ARE THEY VEGAN? THEY DONT LOO
12.
Is there a separate vegan Santa who gets about on a segway or something instead of enslaving reindeers?
13.
netflix & did u know im a vegan
14.
Honey if you don't let the doctor install this vegan placenta our baby will be born a murderer is that what you want
15.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la actually, I'm a vegan
16.
ur a vegan but u dont have kale flavored chapstick? fake
17.
As a vegan my favorite past times include eating twigs and leaves, rolling around in dirt instead of showering & performing human sacrifices
18.
me: eats 20 tubs of hummus and 14 tubes of Pringles me: it's ok it's healthy it's vegan