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The Definitive Ranking Of The Original 151 Pokémon

Gotta cast judgment on ‘em all.

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151. Metapod

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

As one of the first pokémon you encounter, you'd expect Metapod to do something cooler than just "harden." Don't worry, before long, we evolves into the equally useless Butterfree.

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147. Magikarp

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Rumor is Magikarp was added to teach kids about patience, since he evolves into a pretty sweet dragon at level 20. It's the only reason he's not at the bottom of the list.

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141. Jynx

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Setting aside accusations of racism, what exactly is going on here? Is Jynx a person? Is that a dress? Does she, like, have genitals she's covering? Just too much to think about.

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134. Ekans

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Ekans brings a little to the table, but not much. Mostly a lackluster Poison-type, Ekans only real claim to fame was on the Pokémon anime and that its name is "snake" backwards.

132. Meowth

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

For some reason, Meowth is capable of human speech, which is horrifying. If we think about pokémon as intelligent creatures, it makes what we do to them a lot less okay.

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115. Raticate

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

I don't know. I just don't really feel all that intimidated by a what appears to be a cross between a gerbil and a nutria. [Ed. note: Raticate is so underwhelming that I couldn't even find a high res image of it.]

96. Graveler

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Graveler has tiny little legs that it tucks under its body as it floats around. I don't know why it would evolve useless legs, but I guess that's why it barely cracked the top 100.

81. Wartortle

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

I don't know what advantage a turtle gets from evolving furry ears and a tail. Like those of many mid-level evolutions, Wartortle new features just seem like awkward appendages.

70. Poliwhirl

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Poliwhirl is the awkward adolescent phase of its evolution line. Apparently, it's covered in a sheen of slimy, oily moisture at all times, and is very unpleasant to touch.

68. Persian

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

I guess it'd be pretty cool to somehow tame a mountain lion and use it to attack others, but the whole idea of keeping something like that so close makes me a little nervous.

66. Wigglytuff

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Wigglytuff is said to have fur that is so hypnotically soft, those who pet it never want to stop. That seems like a really weird power to have, but I guess Wigglytuff makes it work.

65. Charmeleon

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Some might argue that Charmeleon's look is cooler than Charmander's. Those people are wrong. Charmeleon looks like Charmander going through its awkward teenage years.

60. Bulbasaur

Nintendo / bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net

Generally agreed upon as the worst of all the original starters, and the start of a pretty lackluster evolution line. Unless you're one of those weird Bulbasaur enthusiasts, that is.