1.Average cost of a paper cup: $0.20. Average cost of an avocado: $1.27.
2.Not only do you not get a cup, you don't even get the finished latte and Americano you ordered.
3.Just shovel it all in, you glutton.
4.Almost! Wood plates are definitely a thing, but a slab of wood doesn't quite count.
5.Hey, here's a bright idea! Do you get it? DO YOU GET THE JOKE?!
6.Just cut out the middle man and send the dish out in a pan. Think of the savings.
7.Sure, you can have a fruit salad, but we're serving it to you on a slice of pineapple and there's literally nothing you can do about it.
8.Look! We served you your breakfast in some trash we had in the back! Cute, right?
9.I think there's been some kind of mix-up.
10.Okay, yes, you're going to have to drink a gin and tonic from a baggie, BUT you'll only have to pay twice what you would at a non-hipster bar, so...
11.So the good news is that this dish actually comes with a plate, but the bad news is that there's no actual way to use it.
12.This dessert comes on a big LEGO toy because this restaurant wants to remind you that they think you're a child.
13.Donuts are good. Spaghetti is good. But somehow, spaghetti donuts are the absolute worst.
14.Nothing makes you feel cozier than a lab beaker filled with a hot, unidentified brown liquid. Yum.
15.Just try not to think about dirt, manure, or earthworms and you should be okay.
16.Listen, they need their bread to be rustic as hell. There's nothing rustic about plates. Get real.
17.Instead of a plate, you get a cutting board. Instead of a fry basket, you get a mug. And instead of a decent dining experience, you get... whatever this is.
18.You wanted it to seem like you're eating literal garbage, right?
19.Lots of food comes in shells! What's the big deal?
20.Come on. This is PEAK hipster.
21.Grill your own steak, idiot.
22.Because canned food is the pinnacle of haute cuisine...
