The Canadian Guide To Black Friday

So you wanna get some deals, eh?

Just because you're a proud Canadian.....doesn't mean you can't get in on an American holiday.

#sorry #maplesyrup #timhortons #greatwhitenorth #noimsorry

Even if they do have their Thanksgiving in November.

Because after Yanksgiving comes the real holiday: Black Friday

Black Friday: less than 24hrs after expressing their gratitude for all the things they have, Americans shove, hit & butt each other to get more things

Yes, really.

But since we did the grateful thing a month ago, we have no reason to feel any guilt come Friday

We just get to shop!

As Canadians, we have 3 options for Black Friday shopping. Option 1: head south & shop in America

Pros: better deals, true Black Friday experience

Cons: longer lines, increased chance of bodily harm & loss of faith in humanity

Option 2: Do it online

Pros: no lines, no risk of injury

Cons: no time to browse, needed ability to enter credit card info at super-human speed

Option 3: Shop in Canada

Pros: not as crazy as the US but...

Cons:...the deals are probably not as good

No matter which option you choose, you have to be prepared to lose your inner Canadian

Sorry, but there isn't time for sorries....sorry

Seriously, shut down those polite Canadian emotions

You can go back next weekend with muffin baskets if need be

Assemble your team

Come up with a plan. This day is all about determination and strategy.

Make sure to carbo-load beforehand. This is your marathon.

Don't forget to dress appropriately

You will need snacks. Lots of snacks.

Pro tip: Befriend the sales associates.

If anyone is going to help you find the last pair of limited edition sparkly platform runners in size 8, it's the poor soul who spent all last night stacking them

Have a Plan B

Stealing probably isn't your best bet but it never hurts to have your emergency credit card, back-up cash, friend's wallet and loved one on speed dial ready to race to the next closest mall

And know, when it's all over, you can just curl up into a little ball

Sleep tight, tired kitty. You deserve it.

But you don't have too much time to rest. Because guess what is right around the corner?

BOXING DAY!