Take three seconds and think about what the best part of Thanksgiving is. 1...2...3.
Did you think of your family? No. You didn't. Because all they do at Thanksgiving is start fights and fall asleep at 3 p.m.
Did you think about mashed potatoes? No. You didn't. Because you had them as a side to your 6 ounce sirloin at Chili's last weekend.
Did you think about turkey? No. You didn't. Because removing the neck from its cavity is the most disturbing thing you do all year and it takes forever to cook.
Did you think about green bean casserole? PROBABLY. Because it's magical, scrumptious, and it fulfills all of your wildest dreams.
Green bean casserole is the greatest thing about Thanksgiving for many reasons, but i'll start with the most obvious: It's DELICIOUS.
You've got the perfect amount of creamy smoothness and crunch that makes you want to eat the entire 9x13 Pyrex pan.
And you're an absolute filthy liar if you say you don't eat some of those fried onion things straight out of the package.
Green bean casserole is also the easiest thing in the world to make. All you do is dump cans in a casserole dish and mix it all with a spoon. Pop that baby in the oven and boom, you're done.
It also only comes around during the holidays. People eat mashed potatoes all year. IDK why everyone thinks they're so special.
Plus, no other side can compare. Stuffing is honestly just soggy bread, sweet potato casserole is just vegetable dessert, and mac n' cheese is a summer dish. You know it's all true.
And don't even get me started on cranberry sauce. It's GLORIFIED JAM, PEOPLE. OPEN YOUR EYES.
Green bean casserole is a true original. It belongs on the plates of dinner eaters all around the world.
The biggest issue with green bean casserole is that we don't eat enough of it. We should replace birthday and wedding cakes with green bean casserole.
We should make snowmen out of green bean casserole instead of snow and then we should eat them. The crispy onions would make the perfect eyes.
And we have a world record for world's largest pizza but not world's largest green bean casserole? IT'S A TRUE CRIME.
Green bean casserole is the best part of Thanksgiving, the best part of casseroles, and the best part of life. If you don't agree, then you're wrong. Thank you, goodbye.
