The Cornballer: 7 Crazy Warning Labels On Real Products

You do not have to worry about injuring yourself while making a snack because The Cornballer is illegal in America, and this terrifying product only exists in the world of Arrested Development. However, these real products have warning labels that are too bizarre for even TV writers to dream up.

7. Not Machine Washable

Via oddee.com

This warning label only says people cannot get in the washing machine. Is this a time-saving new way to give your pet a bubble bath? No. Do not put your pet in the washing machine. The spin cycle may look fun, but your fuzzball will not enjoy the power wash.

6. Wake Up Call

Via images.forbes.com

If you figure out how to turn your dryer on while dozing, hopefully you wake up before trying to iron or dice vegetables while asleep.

5.

Via l.yimg.com

This is not the most dangerous letter opener ever created. Staples made a mistake and put the wrong warning label on the package. However, you may still want to wear safety goggles when using the opener if you are particularly accident prone.

4. Iron Out the Kinks

Via womansday.com

Waking up and making it to work on time is challenging for everyone. You may be able to eat your bagel in the car, but do not try to save time by ironing the clothes you are wearing. A few wrinkles are better than second degree burns.

3. Super Dog

Via consoleandhollawell.com

If your dog enjoys a cold martini after driving home from its job operating a forklift, then your pup is in the wrong profession. Head off to Hollywood because your pooch can at least star in a reality show if it does not win America's Got Talent.

2. Age Limit

Via legacy-cdn.smosh.com

This one is just sad. Fortunately, any girl who receives this card will be too young to remember the time mommy and daddy endangered her life. Just make sure no one films the incident.

1. Fashion Forward

Via legacy-cdn.smosh.com

Clothes have so many strings and complicated pieces that it is hard to get dressed sometimes, but the hat has not changed very much over the years. It still goes on top of the head. If you decide to start a new trend and wear a hat on your foot, at least get another one so both feet are covered. It would just look silly otherwise.

These crazy warning labels should make you feel better about your life because you are not the person who caused a need for these insane warnings. These labels can be funny, but if you ever are injured while using something the way it is supposed to be used, you might want the help of pros like Bennet Injury Attorneys. Who knows, your case might make the next warning label!