In case you didn't know, there's a subreddit called r/BrandNewSentence where people share posts that are so creative, so beautifully worded — so unhinged — that they're pretty sure they just read a brand new sentence. Here are some of the best posts from this year:
1. I'm glad we have a term for this now.
That’s the homie in law
— Definitely Not Doug (@DougDefinitely) June 25, 2023
2. I just wanna say "The Wilhelm Scream of dead fictional wives" is my favorite phrase I read this year. Bravo to @otherhappyplace.
why do movies keep doing this shot where the hero has a dead wife and they do a flash back where they are ethereally under a white sheet together, it's really weird. it's like the wilheim scream of dead fictional wives pic.twitter.com/5TSwkoc7QX
— 🦋The Other Happy Place🦋 (@otherhappyplace) April 19, 2023
At my first @Bucks game last night and thought I caught a shirt they fired into the stands out of a cannon. Turns out it was a hot bratwurst. Never in my life did I ever think I’d catch a flying hot brat but here we are. pic.twitter.com/Z0xDC5XPiY
7. Personally, my "talk on the phone pants" are sweatpants with a hole in them.
Once got threatened with "disciplinary action" for wearing jeans instead of khakis at a telesales job and told my boss to just fire me because I wasn't buying a special pair of "talk on the phone pants."
They ended up just changing the dress code to "no profanity."
Aww my microbiome fancies some high quality fermented foods does it? A little kombucha perhaps? I don’t give a shit, I’m the megabiome, I do what I want. I’m having a fanta lemon. I’ll swallow coins
9.You just know the position would be called something like "croaker," too.
10.There's so much to choose from here.
11.That really does paint a picture.
12. Fun fact: You can sing "final boss cop in a goth prom dress" to Nick Cave's "Red Right Hand."
court is all like “place your non shit-wiping hand on this book of half-remembered ghost stories told by inbred winos and promise not to lie to this final boss cop in a goth prom dress.” ok sure man whatever you say.
16. Catch me staring blankly at a wall for an hour after hearing this.
My GF said "The message from Shrek is undercut because Shrek is still pretty attractive" like 20 hours ago and it only just now clicked that that is an absolutely fucking insane take
— Angel of Mists and Mirrors (@ChazakielDoremi) May 18, 2023
Was in Paris on Friday night and a handsome French man was flirting with me and I asked him what his name was and he said (very Frenchly) “Ah you will be disappointed” and I thought what a silly thing to say and then he said “it is Kevin” and you know what? I was disappointed.
18.Can't wait for the sequel to The Queen's Gambit.
19. First garlic, now this??
Imagine you were a vampire nowhere near the Middle East and don’t know who Jesus is but the day after he dies you gotta figure out why lower case t’s started hurting.
