2. Working out is tiring
2013 and all the years before were a fluke. You’ve finally shelled out the money for a gym membership and you are now ready to embrace the physical. How hard can it be? Maybe you’ll even take on that really weird yoga pose you saw that hot person do that one time.
You find yourself at a party. You have no idea what to do with your hands and when people ask you “why aren’t you drinking?” you honestly don’t know the answer. After some D.A.R.E. level peer pressure, you quickly snap and socially lubricate yourself. Ah… all better.
5. Applying for jobs is inconvenient
With sites like Monster, Career Builder, and LinkedIn, there’s no need to feel trapped at your current job! It’s like they say, “It’s okay to be picky, just start with the clicky!”
What? They don’t say that? Well they should. Either way, come 2014 it’s time for you to find the job of your dreams.
If only it was as easy to will a job to hire you. Alas, it’s a little harder than that. Editing resumes, writing cover letters, showing up for interviews, following up with thank you notes, networking, it all takes time. It’s cool to admit that you have other priorities… like that Law & Order: SVU marathon.
So of course, you see that things need to change. So you crack your knuckles, grab a calculator, and see how to tighten those purse strings.
7. Smoking is cool
Your mom, your friends, the surgeon general, they’re all whining about how you need to stop smoking. So enough is enough, you decide to leave the tabacco in 2013 and breathe easy come 2014.
A) Something stressful happens
B) You need to make friends with a cute smoking stranger
C) You get your drink on
D) You have a big meal
E) They’re selling your brand 2 for 1
F-Z) Pretty much anything else…
If only it was as easy as flipping the stress switch off. Turns out your stack of responsibilities paired with not having accomplished resolutions 1-8 is the perfect recipe for SUPER stress. So good luck with that and make sure you make better resolutions for yourself in 2015! Or, it’s not too late to try one of these.
- The public's mistrust of Trump might be especially dangerous in a catastrophe rooted in science — like an asteroid or the next Ebola.
- Thousands of people hit the streets on Saturday to participate in the People's Climate March, a protest against Trump's environmental policies.
- Turkey's government has blocked users in the country from visiting Wikipedia in yet another crackdown on free speech.
- Will Ferrell showed up to a special taping of Samantha Bee's "Not The White House Correspondents Dinner" as George W. Bush.