1. A plant will NEVER challenge your beliefs.
2. Most plants are not angry drunks.
3. Plants don't have ears and are therefore unable to insult your taste in music.
4. Plants aren't film snobs. They won't personally attack you for liking a movie they hate.
5. Or your favorite book--in fact, plants are proud illiterates.
6. It's all but guaranteed that you'll never walk in on a begonia flirting with your ex.
7. A game of Monopoly will never spin wildly out of control with a plant.
8. When's the last time you worried about your plant eating YOUR leftovers?
9. A plant will never pester you about going out more because a plant can't even move.
10. A plant wouldn't even know how to begin to talk about you behind your back.
11. A poinsettia will never offend your cooking because a poinsettia is incapable of consuming human food.
12. A plant is not going to let you down in a time of dire need.
13. You really don't have to worry about your plant standing you up for a date.
14. A plant will not borrow your things and not return them.
15. If some jerk cuts you off on your way to work, you can bet that it wasn't a plant.
16. If you step on dog poop in the middle of the sidewalk, odds are it wasn't a plant that left it there.
17. A plant will never pester you about texting them back.
18. A plant won't set impossible standards and hold unrealistic expectations of you.
19. A plant won't catcall you from a moving vehicle.
20. A plant will never forget to water all of your plants when you go out of town.
21. And of course, GROOT.
