Helga's Mom From "Hey Arnold!" Had A Drinking Problem And It Went Right Over My Head
Hey Arnold! was a lot darker than I thought it was.
It doesn't matter if you're an older millennial or a younger millennial; odds are you grew up watching Hey Arnold!

Nickelodeon
And Hey Arnold! has always been a bit more human and true-to-life than some of the other cartoons we grew up watching. It was never afraid to get serious — I just didn't realize how serious it really was until now.
Helga Pataki? She never had it easy. I mean, her love for her crush was always unrequited. And at home? She was living in her older sister's shadow.

Nickelodeon
But recently — and don't ask me why — I was scrolling through the Hey Arnold! wiki when I arrived on Miriam Pataki's page.
And when I read this paragraph in particular, I spit out all of my coffee directly at my laptop screen. Suddenly, certain parts of this show started to make a lot more sense...

Fandom / Via heyarnold.fandom.com
The smoothies? I remember those...

Nickelodeon
...she was constantly...

Nickelodeon
...drinking...

Nickelodeon
...smoothies.

Nickelodeon
And the passing out? As a kid I thought nothing of it. But now? I can't stop thinking about how tired she always was.
Nickelodeon
Miriam just could not stay awake. And when she was awake, she sounded really tired and, uh, not sober.
Nickelodeon
These hints aren't subtle either. They're right out there in the open. But apparently the writers decided to make Miriam's drinking problem even more explicit, not to mention disturbing...
In a Season 3 episode titled, "Road Trip," Miriam drives very erratically and at one point almost drives off the road.

Nickelodeon
That very same season, the Patakis hire a nanny to watch after Helga because Miriam has to do mandatory community service.

Nickelodeon
And in case they weren't being explicit enough, Season 4 features an episode where Miriam drops Helga off at school. It's here we learn that Miriam not only got her driver's license taken away, but she's also driving without it.

Nickelodeon
And that very same episode? It opens with Miriam looking for her Tabasco sauce, which she keeps in what appears to be her liquor cabinet...

Nickelodeon
...which means she presumably uses it to make "smoothies."

Nickelodeon
In conclusion, Miriam Pataki has a drinking problem and I don't know how I didn't notice it sooner.

Nickelodeon