5. Don’t let yourself go when you escape the dreaded dress code.
7. Do you have more ugly ties than you know what to do with? Well you’ll have them forever. Get used to it.
8. Pro tip: not everyone enjoys poop and dick jokes.
10. Try not to lose your way without these helpful reminders about personal hygiene:
14. The Holy Spirit does NOT need to be the third wheel on every date if you don’t want it to be.
15. You’re going to have to find a new go-to answer for every question you don’t know.
16. Do not let the reasoning, “just because I can” justify your poor decisions after graduation.
17. More times than not, group photos won’t be followed by “a funny one.” But sometimes they are. You’ll be ready.
19. The greatest discovery of all: being unathletic isn’t a big deal. In fact, nobody cares at all.
The struggle is real.
- Nope, President Donald Trump will not release his tax returns after an IRS audit, the White House says, despite pledging to do so.
- Trump has commented on yesterday's massive Women's Marches asking, "why didn't these people vote?"
- Kellyanne Conway says White House press sec. Sean Spicer didn't lie about crowd size at Trump's inauguration. He gave "alternative facts."
- "SNL" paused the laughs for a moment last night to pay tribute to former President Barack Obama.