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18 Things Nobody Ever Warns You About When You Move Out Of India

Naan bread, chai tea, STFU chup kar.

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1. When you're Indian abroad, you get asked a LOT of bizarre questions.

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"Do you speak Hindu?"

"How come your English is so good?"

"Can I ride your elephant?"

"Can you teach me yoga?"

2. "Extra spicy please" is a necessary part of every food order because EVERYTHING. IS. BLAND.

3. People are going to butcher your name, and you're going to start responding to shockingly garbled versions of it.

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4. You're never going to find anything to fill the void of the snacks you find at home.

5. No "Chai Tea Latte" will ever compare to the hot masala cutting chai that you could get literally on every street back home.

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6. And even if you barely ate street food when you actually lived at home, you'll crave it REGULARLY once you leave.

7. Every big-ass party you can't make it home for will give you next level FOMO.

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8. You'll wish you'd listened to your mom when she tried to teach you how to cook Indian food.

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9. You'll often slip into cursing in your mother tongue, and no one will know what the fuck you're talking about.

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(Which is probably a good thing, tbh.)

10. No alcohol abroad will ever taste as good as what you'd find at your local shady bar.

Warner Bros.

11. You're going to try and collect as many tiny reminders of home as you possibly can.

And you'll feel yourself turning into the NRIs you disdained your whole life.
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And you'll feel yourself turning into the NRIs you disdained your whole life.

12. You're going to get used to checking the weather before leaving home every morning because SEASONS. WTF.

13. You may stick out a BIIIITTT when you're losing your shit about cricket in a country that doesn't understand it.

14. No matter how you actually feel about Bollywood movies, you'll find yourself watching a couple out of homesickness.

SLB Films

15. The world may have a plethora of delicacies but none of them will EVER compare to ghar ka khaana.

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16. Every time you return home, errrrrrrrbody is going to give you long-ass shopping lists.

Rega Jha

17. Your suitcase will always reveal your highest priority. (Food. It's food.)

Rega Jha

18. And whoever you were when you left India, you'll return home a patriot.