1.
Because they make your wrists look like they've grown really long, unattractive hair.
2.
Because "classy ravers" don't exist in real life.
3.
Because they make about as much sense as a see-through crop top with a chambray pocket.
4.
And other things go on sale because they're essentially politically incorrect bathrobes.
5.
And these sale shoes might make your feet look like headless, matted puppies.
While these shoes might not even get you through the front door.
6.
Some acid wash jorts end up on sale because they look like they have an outer diaper.
7.
And this dress might be on sale because it will give you distinct @ tan lines.
8.
These "shorts" perhaps because they were not correctly categorized as underpants or "Halloween Only."
9.
This cardigan because fur probably shouldn't look like it's "sprouting."
10.
Note to retailers everywhere: the world is not ready for Skirt Jeans.
11.
Another reason things hit the sale rack? They turn your armpits into braid-able objects of wonder, confusion.
12.
Or they turn you into the Southwestern-accent-wearing housewife you're going to be in 30 years.
13.
Also, we have to have sales because of jumpsuits.
