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The Definitive Ranking Of Every Toronto Blue Jays Player Based On Hotness

Happy home opening ;).

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It's the Blue Jays' Opening Day today, so we thought we would help kick off the season with a very important contribution:

Here is every player on the roster, ranked by hotness.

23. Aaron Loup

Aaron Loup of the #MLBJays arms aren't meant to do this

If he's this much of a contortionist on the mound, imagine what he can do in bed.

Just look at that arm span.
Toronto Blue Jays

Just look at that arm span.

22. Todd Redmond

Todd Redmond of the Toronto Blue Jays models the new hat for pitchers. https://t.co/R7eRcfl9HN

You know what they say: the bigger the hat, the bigger the ...

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Arm reach?
Toronto Blue Jays

Arm reach?

21. Miguel Castro and Roberto Osuna

Roommates, close friends and a big part of the #bluejays future Miguel Castro and @RobertoOsuna1

We feel like these youngins' are double trouble, but also up for anything. #PuppyLove

20. Colt Hynes

Mmm, gimme some! #colthynes #padres #cleatchaser #baseball #sexyboys #men #mmm

We're not sure about #cleatchasing, but given this new Jays' arm reach, we're willing to give it a whirl.

*Whirling*
Toronto Blue Jays

*Whirling*

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19. Mark Buehrle

Who can resist a man with a dog?
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Who can resist a man with a dog?

Or several of them? Too bad he wasn't able to bring them to T.O., thanks to Ontario's pitbull ban. On the plus side, a man with a cause is even hotter.
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Or several of them? Too bad he wasn't able to bring them to T.O., thanks to Ontario's pitbull ban. On the plus side, a man with a cause is even hotter.

18. Brett Cecil

A dude who's good with kids is an instant charmer.
Twitter: @jcecil27

A dude who's good with kids is an instant charmer.

Also, a man with glasses = automatic sexy points.
Twitter: @jcecil27

Also, a man with glasses = automatic sexy points.

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17. Dioner Navarro

drawntomlb.com

There's something to be said for being a gentleman who lends a helping hand.

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Especially one with confidence.

16. Justin Smoak

He looks like an intense dreamer, doesn't he? One who dreams of whisking us away on a surprise getaway. All. Around. The bases.
The Toronto Blue Jays

He looks like an intense dreamer, doesn't he? One who dreams of whisking us away on a surprise getaway. All. Around. The bases.

15. R.A. Dickey

vine.co

It's only polite to warm your hands up before cuddling too, right?

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It's also worth noting those hands know how to do this.

14. Liam Hendricks

Posing with fans is nice, but we're all about these dimples and retro shades.
Twitter: @Swilkinson25

Posing with fans is nice, but we're all about these dimples and retro shades.

Wonder what he looks like stretching first thing in the morning?
Toronto Blue Jays

Wonder what he looks like stretching first thing in the morning?

13. Drew Hutchison

bluejayhunter.tumblr.com

*Tips his hat to the ladies* We see you, Hutchison.

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Even his windup seems gentlemanly.
Toronto Blue Jays

Even his windup seems gentlemanly.

12. Steve Tolleson

Having fun with no shave November. This is my best Robinson Cano impression. If I keep it maybe I will hit like him.

We like a guy who can publicly support an international cause...

bluejayhunter.tumblr.com

And who isn't afraid to get a little dirty...

Off day with my three special girls. So excited to see them. It has been way to long.

But also wears his heart on his (usually camo-covered) sleeve.

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11. Marco Estrada

We'll also sign up for dark, soulful eyes. Especially those of a new player. #FreshMeat
Toronto Blue Jays

We'll also sign up for dark, soulful eyes. Especially those of a new player. #FreshMeat

10. Russell Martin

A well-balanced guy is key, but a dude with this kind of flexibility begs for limits to be... tested.
Twitter: @russellmartin55

A well-balanced guy is key, but a dude with this kind of flexibility begs for limits to be... tested.

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We're also totally down with his sense of humour.

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9. Aaron Sanchez

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After he finishes running towards your heart, you can exchange all of your best eyebrow-maintenance tips.

8. Josh Donaldson

Because he'll obviously pick the best pump-up music before making it rain with you.

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7. Dalton Pompey

instagram.com

Now this is a guy who nows how to use his tongue, even after a good workout.

6. Kevin Pillar

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If he can dive through the sky like this, just think of his Superman moves in bed.

One might be in for a "ride."
Twitter: @KPILLAR4

One might be in for a "ride."

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5. Devon Travis

Just look at those arms -- perfect for bear hugs AND guarding all of your snacks. With someone like this, we'd never go hangry again.
Twitter: @DeVoTrAv

Just look at those arms -- perfect for bear hugs AND guarding all of your snacks. With someone like this, we'd never go hangry again.

My first bass ever out here in the Everglades with @Kyle_T_Smith & #TwitterLessMike !

And yes, he could catch us dinner too.

4. Danny Valencia

Baby face? Check. Long arms to take perfect selfies of your romantic dates? Check. An obvious penchant for shopping? Check. Just so long as his personal closet isn't bigger than yours.
Twitter: @BlueJays

Baby face? Check. Long arms to take perfect selfies of your romantic dates? Check. An obvious penchant for shopping? Check. Just so long as his personal closet isn't bigger than yours.

Okay, we're not that worried about his closet being bigger than ours.
Twitter: @STolleson83

Okay, we're not that worried about his closet being bigger than ours.

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3. Edwin Encarnacion

instagram.com

An intense gaze is ideal for romantic, candlelit dinners. It's like he can see our souls.

Naturally inclined to snuggle = NOTED.
Twitter: @Encadwin

Naturally inclined to snuggle = NOTED.

2. Daniel Norris

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When the apocalypse happens, we'll be safe with Daniel in his van. Since he lives there half of the year anyhow, his survivalist skills will be top notch. Bonus points for that beard, which will keep us warm on chilly nights.

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Living in a van hasn't stopped him from keeping up-to-speed on technology, either.

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1. Jose Reyes and Jose Bautista

instagram.com

We love a dude who is comfortable enough with his masculinity to not only share bromantic moments like these...

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But to also post them on social media. And the Spanish? Now these guys know how to ...roll their tongues. Batters up!

Go Jays, go!