So my partner talks a WHOLE BUNCH in their sleep. Some things are funny, some are random, but one of the absolute creepiest things they ever said was — out of nowhere, in the dark — "There's a raven in here...it's going to get you."
Anyway, this week when Reddit user Jhaydun_Dinan asked, "Those of you with partners who talk in their sleep; what is the creepiest/weirdest/most random thing they've said?" I realized that my partner's weirdness is pretty tame by comparison.
Here are some of the absolute WEIRDEST things people have heard their partners/roommates/siblings say in their sleep:
1. "My partner once, completely at random, yelled, 'OPEN THE WINDOW, ABIGAIL, I'M BURNING LIKE A MEATBALL!' Important note: We don't know an Abigail."
2. "Once in the middle of a dead sleep, my wife did a possessed scream/yell. It went from quiet to loud, then back to quiet in a second flat, and then she started snoring immediately after. I didn’t go back to sleep for a while."
3. "My roommate talks in their sleep almost every night and, one time, he just burst into laughter and said, 'Well, why did none of you try to chop my head off then?'"
4. "My freshmen year I lived with two guys in a dorm who BOTH talked in their sleep. One night, I woke up and one was chanting, 'I am the spring berry, I am the spring berry,' and the other just responded 'Yeah, but Chick-Fil-A said 'no' back in 2011!' They have no memory of this."
5. "It’s not something he says, but something he does: Sometimes, he'll sit straight up and gasp super loud while staring at the wall. I ask what's wrong, but he's asleep. Meanwhile, I can't go back to sleep because I'm so scared."
6. "My wife always jumps at the opportunity to tell people that I once said, 'How come you get the cool spaceships and I get the Jetsons?' while asleep, then made the Jetsons flying car sound."
7. "My ex's kid had a bed in the same room with us (he was four at the time) and one night I happened to wake up and look over at him. He rose from his bed, stared at the wall, and whispered, 'Who are you?' At this point, I was in full NOPE mode, and then he whispered, 'Don't tell them!' and flopped back in his bed."
8. "My wife once indignantly shouted, 'I can't poop here! Everyone is watching!' And I do mean SHOUTED. I was still awake playing on my iPad in bed while she slept and I about jumped out of my skin."
9. "My brother spoke English in his sleep...this is noteworthy because, at the time, we had only just adopted him from Romania three months earlier and he knew zero English. He spoke better English in his sleep than while he was awake."
10. "My wife swears up and down that one time, while she was still up reading before bed, I said: 'I see you didn't bring the bag of leaves? So now I know you're not serious.'"
—Zkv
11. "It's late at night, after midnight. I haven't fallen asleep, so I turn over to try and get comfy and see my girlfriend looking straight at me, then she said, 'Did you see it move?' I promptly panicked and turned the light on, to which she mumbled a groan of displeasure, because my darling girlfriend had slept through this entire thing."
12. "My friend's little brother sleepwalks and once he came into our room. He kicked open the door and said, 'Did you tell mom about the soup thing?!' To which my friend replied, 'What soup thing?' To which he replied, 'You know, the thing with the [strangled screaming noise] and the [bird noise]!' He then stood there for a minute before leaving."
13. "Apparently one time while I was sleeping I grabbed my partner by the shoulders and told her: 'Hey, people are just stacks of years!' like it was the most important thing in the world."
14. "My girlfriend in college — who was from Indiana — out of nowhere, in a thick New York accent, said: 'My ass is grass!' She then promptly fell back asleep."
15. "My girlfriend will sometimes bolt upright and stare into the corner of the room. When I ask her what’s wrong, she’ll say, 'There’s someone in the corner.' I laugh and then she’ll wake up and be like, 'Why did you wake me up? What do you want it’s late?!' I guess it sounds pretty creepy, but honestly, I find it hilarious."
16. "I woke up one night, restless and hot, so I turned on the AC. My husband appeared to wake up, too. He sat up and said, 'I’m your fan!' and waved his hands like a fan, then laughed at his own joke and went back to sleep. He did not remember it in the morning."
17. "I was told by my fiancé that he came to bed one night after I had already fallen asleep. He started rubbing my back, which prompted me to sleep-say: 'This just in! Local boy massages...other local boy!' I am a 26-year-old female, but that night I was apparently a young 19th century newsboy at heart."
So, what's the weirdest/creepiest/funniest/just plain "what the heck?!" thing you've ever heard someone say while they were sleeping? Share your story in the comments below!
