1.
According to movies, you should be wearing a matching bra and panty set at all times if you have boobs and a vagina.
2.
Also, you should leave your bra on both during AND after sex.
3.
But, if your bra somehow comes off, you should cover your boobs with a sheet immediately.
4.
And the same goes for anyone with a penis. Your penis should NEVER see the light of day during sexy-time.
5.
If you listen to movie sex scenes, foreplay should never last more than 30 seconds or you're doing it wrong.
6.
And kissing in the rain is the OPTIMAL form of foreplay.
7.
Alternatively, try some ~indoor rain~ because shower sex ALWAYS works and no one ever gets injured.
8.
Same with pool sex, it's always a great idea.
9.
And bathtub sex? Just the best.
10.
Your sexual partners will LOVE it when you break their belongings.
11.
Sexual partners also love when you RIP their clothes without asking.
12.
Sex is NEVER funny, quirky, or silly...no matter what happens.
13.
And no one needs lube for penetrative sex EVER for some reason.
14.
In movies, you never have to pee after sex to prevent a UTI.
15.
And moaning should be the ONLY SOUND your bodies ever make.
16.
Every orgasm you have should be in slow motion.
17.
And finally, those with vaginas ALWAYS orgasm from penetrative sex alone, every single time, without fail.
