22 Black Friday Horror Stories From Retail Workers Who Lived To Tell
You have no idea how many people crap in the fitting rooms.
1. Clean up at register 9.
"This lady with a little kid came up to my register and set her down on the ground. The young girl began complaining about having to use the bathroom and the mom kept ignoring her or telling her to wait until they got home. The daughter ended up peeing all over my station and the mom didn't say anything about it. She paid, grabbed her bags, and said that I should clean that up and just left." —Ashton David, Facebook
2. Praying for sanity.
"At one point there were maybe 200 people in line to check out, when a woman with two full carts tried to cut to the very front. She told me that she was buying toys for kids in her church, so she should be expedited. I apologized and told her that was not going to happen. Then, right there in the middle of the store, she got down on her knees and started praying — LOUDLY— that Jesus strike me down with righteous lightning for blocking the path of a Christian soldier. After 15 minutes of me not being struck down, she left the store." —Emmay Friedenson, Facebook"
3. She's gotta have that coffee.
"I've worked on Black Friday for about seven years now, but the worst was back in 2012. I was working at Fry's Electronics and we opened at about 5:30 a.m.. We had this Mr. Coffee machine that was on sale for $3, and I witnessed one lady punch another lady in the face for our last non-reserved one." —Carla Catalan, Facebook
4. Fitting rooms are not bathrooms.
"Someone pooped in the fitting rooms once. On purpose. Like, there was just a pile of solid turds on the carpet." —margareto46dc6ab5f
5. You need a gas mask to get a TV these days.
"I once worked a Black Friday at TRU. A guest sprayed mace behind them as they ran in front of the pack towards the electronics section." —Vince Plowman, Facebook
6. A new kind of mannequin challenge.
"I was checking out a group of younger men and the one paying had what seemed to be a prosthetic hand in the sleeve of his hoodie. About an hour later a co-worker came over the headset in a panic because one of the mannequins was missing a hand. Turns out he had checked out with our mannequin hand and stole it! WHO does that?!" —kaylareneo
7. Broken bones, broken dreams.
"When I was trying to pick up an expensive jewelry set off of the floor, I was pushed over and stepped on by a hoard of people. LITERALLY STEPPED ON. My foot was broken and I couldn’t work for months." —lilym42e8479fd
8. The makeup counter meltdown.
"I worked for M.A.C a great number of years, and during one particularly dark Black Friday I saw a coworker get spit on by a customer who was unhappy with how long she had been waiting to purchase a lipstick. SPIT ON. Let that sink in." —meghanjlee
9. The sweater shakedown.
"A customer called asking for a sweater she said she put on hold. We didn't do Black Friday holds. When I told her the sweater wasn't available she said she wished she was in the store so she could put her hands around my neck and choke me. All because the sweater wasn't available." —des
10. Mob mentality.
"My managers stationed me near the front doors next to several tall cardboard bins filled with $3 scarves, gloves, and hats. When we finally opened the doors at midnight, all of the customers who had been waiting in a line outside came rushing in and kept pushing into me to get further into the store. One woman placed each of her hands on my shoulders and SHOVED. I went flying into two of the cardboard bins, which then broke and spilled everywhere." —Kaitlin Bilodeau, Facebook
11. Game face.
"I worked at GameStop and we were not taking trades that day because we only had two registers. A customer ignored the entire line and came straight up to my register and said he had more than 150 items to trade, and I apologized and told him to come back on Saturday. He proceeded to throw each item he brought with him at me, one at a time, in the face, until I called the cops. Not only did he get arrested that day, he isn’t allowed to step foot in another GameStop". —spookydelight
12. A menagerie of horrors.
"I watched a little old lady pepper spray someone over towels." —katw46e15b743
13. The $200 surprise.
"I worked at Bebe on Black Friday a few years ago. Someone literally took a shit in one of the dressing rooms then covered it with a $200 dress and disappeared out the door." —SQVID
14. The green apple conspiracy.
"A customer demanded that my co-worker Mira 'check the back' for a green apple scent. Calmly, Mira explained that green apple was discontinued a few years ago. The customer picked up the nearest bottle and aggressively sprayed body shimmer two inches away from Mira’s face as if it were mace. One of Mira’s eyelids swelled completely shut. She had to wear an eyepatch for a week afterwards." —rachelb4dfe9cbb5
15. Not the best moment in parenting.
"My first Black Friday, I was watching over the self checkout at my Super Target. When the doors opened, I saw a woman holding an infant child who couldn’t have been older than three months elbow a lady in the face for a cart even though there were more close by." —kaylab0113
16. That escalated quickly.
"I witnessed a mom stick her finger down her throat and projectile vomit in the fitting room because she didn’t get an extra discount." —jessicab4d6244413
17. Shop in peace.
"A lady came up to me to complain about how many people were in the store and said she couldn’t get to the sale items she wanted because of the crowds. She asked if I could make everyone leave so that she could shop the sales in peace. I told her that wasn't possible. A few minutes later the fire alarm went off and we had to evacuate the whole store. The fire department came and found that lady trying to shop. She had pulled the alarm to get everyone out so she could shop in peace. She got arrested in case anyone was wondering." —kaylac469d7edd5
18. The prettiest war zone.
"I work at Victoria’s Secret and we had been open for about two hours when shoplifters decided to come in and steal our entire launch table. Instead of just grabbing it and running they decided they should spray mace so nobody would run after them. We had to emergency evacuate the store. I had burns from the mace all over my hands and my clothes smelled so bad I ended up having to throw them away." —heatherb4f75e9ba5
19. Time to call child services.
"I work at Walmart and a fight between two women broke out and one woman flipped the other woman’s stroller with her baby in it over and, instead of helping her child, the mother tackled the other woman. The store manager had to pick her child up and make sure it wasn’t hurt. Turns out they knew each other and had an argument before, and decided the middle of Walmart during Black Friday was the perfect time to fight." —sureiguess
20. Can't catch a break.
"One time I got violently ill Thanksgiving morning. My boss told me I had to be in or I was fired. Every few minutes I had to duck under my counter to get sick in the garbage.
To top it all off I got called into the office at the end of my shift because several customers complained my line was too slow. Not that I was getting sick in front of them, but because I was moving slowly for some reason." —keelhaulrose2
21. No time to waste.
"I was 16, it was my first Black Friday working, and I was assigned the shoe department. We didn’t have the size a lady was looking for so I offered to check our system for another store. She proceeded to shout, 'I don’t have that kind of f***ing time!' and threw the shoe at me. She ended up hitting me in the mouth and splitting my lip. 'Tis the season." —kimberlym4e1b1a91f
22. A literal shitshow.
"A customer was having problems finding an associate to help them in the shoe department. So what did he do? Dropped his drawers in the middle of the shoe department and crapped all over the floor. Then another customer didn’t see the mess and stepped in it before it could be cleaned up." —joelh483d48dbd
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and clarity.