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21 Things You'll Remember If You Grew Up In A Crap British Town

You: "Mum, I'm bored." Your mum: "Only boring people get bored."

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1. First of all, there was literally nothing to do at the weekends – except "town".

commons.wikimedia.org / Alex Finnis / BuzzFeed

Which meant you and a couple of friends meeting up in the town centre, hanging around in the exact same shops without buying anything for as long as you could bear it, getting a frappuccino from Starbucks and then going back home again.

2. You spent a lot of time in shops like Virgin Megastore and HMV searching through discount CDs and DVDs you'd never even heard of.

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3. When you wanted to go shopping properly, you had to travel to the nearest city.

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Because you couldn't buy your entire wardrobe at Next and Dorothy Perkins.

4. Your pub choice was very limited, because a lot of them were either pretty rough or pretty grim.

5. Which meant that you and your mates got stuck in a routine of going to the same couple of places for years.

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And you probably still go to them when you go back and meet up now.

6. There was only one nightclub worth going to, and it was still extremely awful.

We're talking sticky floors, watered-down blue fishbowls that were way too expensive for where you were, and a mixture of 17-year-old kids and strange men in their forties dancing like they'd long since vomited their dignity into a urinal.
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We're talking sticky floors, watered-down blue fishbowls that were way too expensive for where you were, and a mixture of 17-year-old kids and strange men in their forties dancing like they'd long since vomited their dignity into a urinal.

7. It probably also closed and reopened several times under a catalogue of terrible names like "Fever" and "Bliss".

Because even though it had no competition, it somehow never made any money.
Flickr: bensutherland

Because even though it had no competition, it somehow never made any money.

8. You spent a lot of your time as a teenager hanging about in a shit park with broken swings.

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Because there was nothing else to do and hey, it's a British tradition.

9. And when you got a little bit older, you did exactly the same thing, except with booze.

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The booze was always terrible, because of course it was. Strongbow, Vodkat, Woodpecker cider, maybe even Special Brew...

10. Although after school, you mostly just hung out by the bus station.

Because yep, that's right, there was fuck all else to do.
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Because yep, that's right, there was fuck all else to do.

11. Describing where you lived when you went abroad was basically impossible.

You'd normally just give up and tell them how many hours it was from London.
Thinkstock / Alex Finnis / BuzzFeed

You'd normally just give up and tell them how many hours it was from London.

12. There was one shop that seemed cursed, because whatever opened there would close down again a few months later.

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13. You had at least one pound shop, and probably a 99p shop too.

The best place to buy large quantities of sweets.
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The best place to buy large quantities of sweets.

14. A lot of your school friends probably lived quite far from you, which meant your parents had to drive you everywhere.

They would also frequently remind you that they were "not a taxi service". Yeah OK, Dad.
Thinkstock / Twitter: @taylorlanex_

They would also frequently remind you that they were "not a taxi service". Yeah OK, Dad.

15. If anything summed up how little there was to do, it was your local newspaper.

16. Although it would occasionally produce an absolute gem of a story.

17. Woolworths closing down was a genuine blow to your life.

commons.wikimedia.org / Alex Finnis / BuzzFeed

18. There was one massive roundabout that everyone freaked out about at school when you started driving lessons.

Mastering it, then making sure everyone knew you had, was a matter of pride.
en.wikipedia.org

Mastering it, then making sure everyone knew you had, was a matter of pride.

19. You would always make jokes about how crappy your town was.

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20. But if anyone from somewhere else tried to join in, you'd shut them down straight away.

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It might be a crap town, but it's your crap town, so back off.

21. Because no matter how crap it is, it's the place you grew up, and will always be a little bit special.

Alex Finnis / BuzzFeed / Via craptownsreturns.co.uk