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    The 19 Worst Crimes Ever Perpetrated Against Pumpkins

    They're just innocent lil gourds, leave them alone. (NSFW, unfortunately.)

    1. Any time a pumpkin is made to look like it's vomiting.

    2. Any time a pumpkin is made to look like it's vomiting A DIFFERENT FOOD.

    3. When a pumpkin is forced to toke against its will.

    4. Or to eat one of its brethren.

    5. Or a Barbie.

    6. Or a human.

    7. Two words: Punkin' Chunkin'.

    8. When a pumpkin is used as a canvas for the immature.

    10. Or the pornographic.

    11. Or the downright obscene.

    12. When the noble name of the pumpkin was besmirched for this hoax.

    13. Whenever someone sees fit to make a pumpkin resemble a human butt.

    14. Especially if there is underwear involved.

    15. Especially if there is ~this~ involved.

    16. That goes double for men's genitalia.

    17. And quadruple for what's going on here.

    18. WHEN PARENTS STARTED PAINTING PICTURES OF PUMPKINS ON THEIR POOR HELPLESS OFFSPRINGS' TUCHUSES.

    Getty Images/iStockphoto paulrichstudio

    This is a REAL TREND and it MUST BE STOPPED.

    19. When this happened.

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