33 Hilarious Tweets From The Week Because You Deserve To Have A Little Laugh

"I am like the opposite of artificial intelligence. Genuine stupidity." —@surajdukhii

As much as I want to spend less time online, the chaos, funny moments, and real-time pop culture reactions on Twitter keep me wide-eyed, phone-in-hand, screen bright, and scrolling.

HBO / Via Twitter: @iminamtg

So here we are again — another week where I will share all the funny tweets I found for you. Between the Kendrick and Drake rap beef, Challengers movie release, and the general spring fever in the air, there was no shortage of funny moments, so let's get right into 'em:

1.

i understand that my body can't digest corn or whatever. that's fine. my issue is that i fucking chewed it. how the hell is it coming out back in the shape of corn. what are they not telling us

— tate (@50FirstTates) April 29, 2024

Twitter: @50FirstTates

2.

Selecting all images with traffic lights https://t.co/EGatdbjjBf

— Rapido ◣ ◢ (@rapidodraws) April 30, 2024

Twitter: @rapidodraws

3.

sometimes you chop one onion and put it in a pan and think, this simply won’t do. so you chop another onion and put it in the pan, and now you have the amount of onions a clown would eat, at the circus

— corn (@normal_food) April 30, 2024

Twitter: @normal_food

4.

weeping uncontrollably at skee ball because my nephew whiffed a five leg parlay and now I can't afford dental https://t.co/su4nvyo88S

— Dan Toomey (@dhtoomey) April 30, 2024

Tiffany Rose/Getty Images for Six Degrees or Influence / Via Twitter: @dhtoomey

5.

When I tell you this has me in TEARS!!!! pic.twitter.com/RfrBxTYAE6

— TheBlackPlumbob (@TheBlkPlumbob) April 30, 2024

PBS / Via Twitter: @TheBlkPlumbob

6.

did he burglarize the Wii bowling alley https://t.co/cgzY8QSxTR

— Matt Margolis (@ItsMattsLaw) April 29, 2024

Kent Police / Via Twitter: @ItsMattsLaw

7.

WHAT IS THIS 😭😭😭😭 pic.twitter.com/xQUuL3XqQ0

— daniel 🦕🍉 (@pheremoneocean) May 4, 2024

Twitter: @pheremoneocean

8.

i am like the opposite of artificial intelligence. genuine stupidity.

— smokeyhouse (@surajdukhii) April 30, 2024

Twitter: @surajdukhii

9.

I love saying “sounds good” at work and don’t shit sound good

— betel (@betelreloaded) May 1, 2024

Twitter: @betelreloaded

10.

i feel like when my landlord gets my rent they should text me like “thank you!!” or “got it ♥️” or something

— Youngmi MAYER 💜 (@ymmayer) May 1, 2024

Twitter: @ymmayer

11.

MGM /Courtesy Everett Collection / Via Twitter: @sxspirium

12.

*me, rearranging my spice rack alphabetically* Ok, what comes after thyme?

Cyndi Lauper: thyme

— Stone Cold Jane Austen (@AbbyHiggs) May 3, 2024

Twitter: @AbbyHiggs

13.

It has come to my attention, that describing my neighbor as “Dead behind the eyes” is perhaps, rude and morbid. I apologize. Moving forward, I will now describe my neighbor as “Lookin like she has the dvd logo bouncin around her skull.” Way more fun and lively I think.

— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) May 2, 2024

Twitter: @StruggleDisplay

14.

Fuck it I just don’t care anymore what’s the point pic.twitter.com/0MZ3U20079

— gently used ass rag (@mastergoobway) May 1, 2024

Twitter: @mastergoobway

15.

No you freaky bitch! https://t.co/MxQQhVG4Ic

— m. (@moseason_) May 5, 2024

Twitter: @moseason_

16.

Instead of “happy hour” I wanna go to a “grievance hour” where the drinks and appetizers are half price and everyone steps up to the microphone but instead of karaoke they complain about their lives

— Grip Bayless💕 (@talleyberrybaby) May 3, 2024

Twitter: @talleyberrybaby

17.

9pm at a sleepover: omg this is so fun we should paint our nails next

3am at a sleepover: https://t.co/F8GJ5xy92t

— androacid (@androacid) May 3, 2024

Twitter: @androacid

18.

I loveeee having 3 martinis I understand why my dad chose this over raising me

— 777 (@_garrettcharles) May 3, 2024

Twitter: @_garrettcharles

19.

Best friends are so crazy like wow this person would kill for me but also if I mispronounce a word in front of them they will make fun of me for it forever

— Keara Sullivan (@superkeara) May 5, 2024

Twitter: @superkeara

20.

The men are rapping about taking ozempic and getting lipo…WE NEED MECHANICS

— Amari Symoné (@MarMarr08) May 4, 2024

Twitter: @MarMarr08

21.

Lin Manuel Miranda https://t.co/1F6muIMm64

— Rohita Kadambi (@RohitaKadambi) May 4, 2024

Twitter: @RohitaKadambi

22.

my car is fucked pic.twitter.com/qCL1NHWtHr

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) May 1, 2024

Twitter: @adamgreattweet

23.

why are all the "cozy games" about managing a small business or working on a farm. these are the two least relaxing things you can do

— sorrel (@sorrelquest) May 2, 2024

Twitter: @sorrelquest

24.

@coolhandluka_ / Via Twitter: @coolhandluka_

25.

I have 100 cookbooks written by real chefs and cooks but instead every night I Google “food weeknight dinner fast” and make a recipe from a blog I will never visit again called like Parsnips and Cowlicks or Girl With a Spatula or Hearts of Pam

— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) May 4, 2024

Twitter: @clhubes

26.

This is still one of the greatest autographs of all time. pic.twitter.com/9ZC84jTzbe

— Eric Alper 🎧 (@ThatEricAlper) May 2, 2024

Twitter: @ThatEricAlper

27.

Someone on Nantucket bought a cybertruck and the local newspaper has been following them around making fun of them pic.twitter.com/QREU2QIOJi

— wendy’s kid (@JermHimselfish) May 4, 2024

Twitter: @JermHimselfish

28.

I used to calm myself down in elementary school by imagining this poster pic.twitter.com/9OlHmLsuTT

— charity genius (@BoneWarper) April 29, 2024

Trend Enterprises / Via trendenterprises.com

29.

bro it’s 1 am. my son sits up & projectile vomits everywhere, the whole bed, both sides of the floor, the bathroom when we got him there. it was some Are We There Yet? shit. when he’s done, he gets up chipper as ever. feeling GREAT & says “mama why do humans have hair?” girlWHAT? pic.twitter.com/7uzhOXZNAY

— Kemi Marie (they/them) (@kemimarie) May 5, 2024

Twitter: @kemimarie

30.

THE WORDING 😭😭😭😭 like yes she did babes! for almost 9 years! pic.twitter.com/3cTRpLOGqh

— tor (@emailsavenue) May 1, 2024

@gypsyblanchard.tiktok / Via tiktok.com

31.

TSA lady was scannin my id & was like Girl ik them nails was $150 n i said No they was $40😭 & she looked at me like 😐 n pulled me to the side n made me write down who did em Then the security guard gon say Look she cant even write in them shits she holdin the pen like a caveman pic.twitter.com/7cjaUlP0vA

— tia (@dontfacetimeme) May 4, 2024

Nickelodeon / Via Twitter: @dontfacetimeme

32.

Dental hygienist: you have to floss more. stop drinking so much coffee and tea. You CANNOT go on living like this

Dentist: (holding my jaw to inspect it like a prized horse) yup lookin good

— tabitha (@thetolerantweft) May 5, 2024

Twitter: @thetolerantweft

33.

it looks like he’s guest starring on hannah montana https://t.co/xhx5Di8r7R

— DJ (@DonTheCreator_) May 1, 2024

CBS / Via Twitter: @DonTheCreator_

That's it for this week! Don't forget to shoot these creators a follow if they made you laugh. And if you're looking for more tweets to keep ya laughing, check out our previous roundups:

24 Hilarious Tweets From The Week Because Humor Makes Everythinggg Better

I Can't Help But Cackle At These 29 Funny Little Tweets From The Week