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    Stock Tips From Shia LaBeouf

    Shia LaBeouf is a trader now! He made Wall Street 2, and now he's giving tips to reporters. Luckily, he also agreed to share some hot tips here. $$$ ahead!

    • Let's get up in the market and find us some STOCKS.

    • Buy: InterOil

      This is the one I told the GQ guy about. Major momentum. Believe the hype.

    • Sell: Avon Products

      One word: mancession. Another word: ladycession.

    • Buy: Petsmart

      Call and put, baby! Puppies!

    • Short: Apple

      Big bucks only go to the ballsy, man! Bear-wolfish.

    • Buy: Chipotle Mexican Grill, Inc.

      Bull market for vegan burritos. Double short-swing.

    • Buy: Skechers USA

      Then you can ride her. Derivatives!

    • Sell: Men's Wearhouse, Inc

      No chance for a Pac-Man.

    • Short: Office Depot

      Single stock futures are UP, redlining minimal. Get in there and CLOSE.

    • Buy: Bones from a Vendor You Trust

      Quality bones are crucial for any sort of stock. Don't skimp; you deserve the best.

    • And remember:

      Coffee is for traders only.