If Baywatch Was Rebooted With Former Disney Channel Stars

Pilot Episode, "Malibu: Escape From Rehab!"

Mitch Buchannon, AKA, The Hoff

can be replaced by none other than....

ZAC EFRON! (Um, no duh.)

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Can we coin the phrase "an ab for an ab"?

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Step aside, PAMELA ANDERSON...

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C.J. Parker's legacy will now be...

MILEY CYRUS resurrecting the Hannah Montana wig...and adding a boob job (that shouldn't take much convincing).

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Actually, how has that NOT happened yet?

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She offers good advice, Miley.

Better keep running, YASMINE BLEETH.

'Cause we've got a GOMEZ.

Work it, Selena.

Adios, Alexandra Paul.

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LT. STEPHANIE HOLDEN, time to make way for some...

VANESSA HUDGENS...already rockin' the red.

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Plus, we can relive some old Efron flames from High School Musical.

MATT BRODY. (Yeah, that one guy.)

Swapping one great smile for another...

CORBIN BLEU

That other dude with an adorable smile.

LOGAN FOWLER, resident charming douche bag.

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Who better than...

JOE. JONAS.

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This picture's worth one solid word: douchey.

SGT. GARNER ELLERBEE

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Your reputation precedes you, much like...

SHIA LABEOUF

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Working in the sun might help improve this guy's mood.

Aaaaaand...we all know LINDSAY LOHAN wants to be this generation's Marilyn Monroe. But, honey, how about you settle for the recurring guest star role, GAYLE BUCHANNON (or Mitch's baby mama)

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Make Wendie Malick proud.

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Commence the slow motion running!

I'll be ready.