Places We'd Rather Be Over Sochi, Russia

By now, you’ve probably all seen the nightmare that is Sochi’s hotel accommodations. Toilet lids installed upside-down, dead bees in containers of honey, missing door handles on hotel rooms, and yellowed drinking water are just a few of the horror stories that journalists and visitors to Sochi have been broadcasting across social media. As the Olympic’s opening ceremonies commence today, let’s take a look at all the places we’d rather be than in Sochi, Russia.

Standing in traffic

"The City That Never Sleeps" by Dina Prasetyawan

Drifting through the never-ending terrors of space all alone

"Never Ending" by Adam Rajcevich

In the stomach of a Sandworm

"Recently Deceased" by Paul Berthelot

Bleeding out in the back of a car

"Color-coded Criminals" by Loy Valera

Holed up in a cave

"Always Digging" by Florent Bodart

Worshipping Satan

"EVERY TIME A CAT CLEANS ITSELF IT IS WORSHIPPING THE DARK LORD" by Jerrod Landon Porter

Partying with the crème de la crème of Russia

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"The Communist Party" by Tom Burns

Being rescued by the jaws of life

"I'm Sure I Used To Fit" by Aled Lewis

Trying to survive a zombie apocalypse

"The Horde" by Aled Lewis

Stranded in an airport (not in Russia)

"The No-fly List" by Teo Zirinis

But really, all we have to say about those Sochi hotel accommodations is:

"NOPE." by Carl Mitsch