5 Bullsh*t Excuses Used To Justify Laws

Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one. And many times, people decide to make those opinions mandatory through legislation. Examples range from conservatives opposition to Marijuana & Gay Marriage to liberals opposition to Gun Ownership and Big Gulp Sodas. Everybody wants to ban something. Here are five really stupid excuses people use to justify criminalization.

5: It's To Protect The Children

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Yeah, How original. Ban smoking (to protect the children). Ban guns (to protect the children). Ban pornography (to protect the children). Ban video games (to protect the children).

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To those of you who use this excuse because you're over protective parents/guardians who can't bare the idea of a free society in which every aspect of life isn't child friendly, stop forcing your incessant worrying onto the rest of us. Individuals smoking weed isn't gonna make little jimmy become a drug dealer and individuals watching porn isn't gonna make little sally become a whore. (Well, maybe... Invest in parental control software)

And to those of you who are just using children as a tool of emotional exploitation so that you can pass your beliefs upon others...

4: It's A Slippery Slope!

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Everyone's favorite fallacy.

-Gay Marriage is a slippery slope to BESTIALITY!!!

-Violent video games are a slippery slope to MURDER!!!

-Marijuana is a slippery slope to CRACK!!!

-Asking someone to join you for a cup of coffee is a slippery slope to RAPE!!!

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Guess what. Stupid people asking stupid politicians to pass stupid laws to prevent a stupid paranoid future scenario is a slippery slope to becoming... Oh.

3: It's For Our Safety!

Honestly, if you hear this come from somebody's mouth. You're probably listening to a politician or a statist. Now, we all want laws that "protect" us from against acts of aggression such as murder, assault, theft (unless the governments doing it), property damage, etc. But damn people take it too far.

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"Why are you spying on my emails, text messages and phone calls?" -To protect you from terrorists.

"Why are you groping my balls and confiscating my cocoa butter before I get on a plane?" -To protect you from bombs.

"Why are you arming the local police with LAV's, Inferred surveillance drones, and fully automatic assault rifles?" -To protect you from criminals.

"Why are you preventing me from drinking raw milk, sharing my car & my house with somebody for money, or opening up an unregulated lemonade stand in front of my house?" -To protect you from... Uh... Freedom?

Yes, these laws are made to control us and take our freedom. If you believe that politicians write these laws because they genuinely care about your safety...

2: It's To Prevent Incentive

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Apparently some people believe that there's this huge portion of the population who's just waiting to do something that's illegal. Drugs, Incest, Prostitution, Masturbation, etc.

They hold the idea that if we decriminalize these activities, more and more people will suddenly feel the urge to partake & engage. As if legalizing something is equivalent to the government promoting it.

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Look, chances are if someone wants to do something, they're gonna do it anyway. Regardless of whether there's a law banning it or not. The only thing laws do is make these activities more dangerous and vulnerable to crime.

If meth is legalized, I'm not gonna go smoke meth. Cigarettes are legal and I don't smoke those. Weed is illegal and I still smoke that occasionally.

If masturbation is banned, you think that's gonna stop me from fapping?

If prostitution is legalized, It's not gonna incentivise me to go become an escort. (Just Kidding, $250 a hour. No kissing)

Bottom line, laws that turn peaceful activities into victimless crimes don't magically stop people from doing the activities. And legalizing them won't magically make everyone start doing it. I'm gonna do what I wanna do regardless. Why? Because...

1: It's the law!

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This has got to be the worst of them all. People might know a law is terrible. They might agree that it infringes on individuals rights. They might even be a victim of the insane piece of legislation. But they accept it & the consequences because "It's the law. We just have to deal with it".

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If you're the type of person who sees a victim of government overreach, someone who has done nothing wrong or harmed anyone or anyone's property in any way but got arrested simply for disobeying a bullshit law, and thinks "It's you're fault, you should've just obeyed the law, you deserve what you get".

I only have two words for you...

That's all guys. Thanks for reading. Be sure to share your opinion below and hit me up on social media! And last but not least, consider #Anarchy :)