1. Shake your boobs into larger, bouncy orbs of boob-o-lusciousness with the Top Charming Breast Stimulator!
2. Make your face firm and youthful with this Ridiculous-Looking Oral Product (That Appears To Be For Something It’s Not, But Never Mind)
3. Make your smile happier, wider, more approachable by shoving a long plastic insert into your mouth — The Beauty Smile Trainer!
4. Jiggle your way to fitness (and have a few screaming o’s too) with the Ride ‘Em Cowboy Exercise Machine
5. Make your nose cute and turned up at the end with the battery-powered vibrations from The Beauty Lift High Nose!
6. … Or straighten it with the Hana Tsun Nose Straightener! (And it’s so comfortable too!)
7. Look like a serial killer (Jason, anyone?) and get rid of wrinkles with the Rejuvenique Electric Facial Mask!
8. Get fit AND learn English phrases that don’t make a whole lot of sense with this Video!
9. Cleanse those pores and look like a cyborg too with The Aluminum Facial Spa!
10. Roll your boobs to a larger cup size with The Beau Bust Roller!
11. Firm that double chin and lose that turkey wattle (oh, and look like an idiot) doing Mimrobics with Oleg!
12. Eat delicious low-calorie cookies and get bigger melons … with F-Cup Cookies!
13. Lose those breast wrinkles (…which we didn’t know existed but now we do and you might have them, especially if you’ve been eating those cookies…!) with the Intimia Cleavage Pillow!
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