15 Words That Have A Totally Different Meaning In Montreal

“Yes, we’re Canadien.”

1. “Winter”

What it means everywhere else: The coldest season of the year.

What it means in Montreal: The only season in the year. The rest are almost winter, a little less winter, very winter, are you fucking kidding me winter.

2. “Construction”

What it means everywhere else: Construction.

What it means in Montreal: The season that comes before a little less winter, and almost winter again winter.

3. “Strip Club”

What it means everywhere else: Adult entertainment spots found in seedier parts of town.

What it means in Montreal: Just something on the corner of every downtown block. Kinda like a depanneur. Just part of the scenery.

4. “Driving/Biking In Snow”

What it means everywhere else: Extremely dangerous and risky feats during winter months that local anchors repeatedly advise against attempting.

What it means in Montreal: Your daily commute 80% of the year.

5. “Protest”

What it means everywhere else: Demonstrations and organized rallies in order to sway and influence public opinion and/or policy.

What it means in Montreal: Things that stand in the way of your morning commute to work.

6. “Poutine”

What it means everywhere else: French fries, cheese curds, gravy. You’ve tried some at a local diner.

What it means in Montreal: Not just a food, but a way a life (UN ART DE VIVRE) composed by hot gravy/sauce drizzled over delicately melting cheese curds on a bed of browned crispy fries. And sometimes taken to new heights with smoked meat. This is the best drunk food you can have at 4 in the morning. And no one — I repeat — no one does or consumes poutine the way Quebec does.

7. “Smoked Meat”

What it means everywhere else: Pastrami (kind of).

What it means in Montreal: Waiting in line at Schwartz’s for meat perfection between two slices of bread.

What it means everywhere else: In other Canadian cities, you go out, have a good time, and a call it a night when bars close around 1:30 A.M.

What it means in Montreal: You go out, have a good time, continue your good feels, end up in a club, wreak drunken havoc, until you are slumped over a balcony on Crescent st. at 4 A.M.

9. “Canadians”

What it means everywhere else: “Canadians”

What it means in Montreal: “Canadiens.”

10. “Habs”

What it means everywhere else: “What’s a hab?”

What it means in Montreal: Hockey dynasty.

What it means everywhere else: Crossing a road illegally or recklessly. Can be fined for.

What it means in Montreal: Crossing a road illegally or recklessly. Can be fined for. Probably will be. Still does it. Like a f*cking pro.

12. “0 Degree Celsius”

What it means everywhere else: A pretty frigid temperature. Also known as the point when water freezes.

What it means in Montreal: Sangria-sipping-on-a-rooftop-terrace-in-a-light-jacket-weather.

13. “Ice Rink”

What it means everywhere else: A manmade arena open during the winter months for recreational ice skating, hockey, curling, etc.

What it means in Montreal: The street in front of your apartment.

14. “Old Montreal”

What it means everywhere else: A romantic time capsule of classic European architecture, cobble stone roads, and cute cafés.

What it means in Montreal: Tourists, poorly paved streets, old buildings, expensive restaurants.

15. And “Bagels”

What it means everywhere else: A doughy, chewy, often salty ~NY-style~ breakfast staple.

What it means in Montreal: A crispier, sweeter, denser and BETTER breakfast staple. WILL FIGHT ANYONE ON THIS. TO DEATH.
Um, St Viateur anyone?

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