1. The Person Watching at Work
“What? I just get really excited about pivot tables, you guys!”
Where you can find them: Angling their monitor away from prying eyes.
2. The Social Media Expert
“OMG Bob Costas #crazy #lifelongfan”
Where you can find them: Updating their Tumblr and live-tweeting the event.
3. The Hardcore Fan
“If Shani Davis doesn’t win another gold medal in speed skating I will LITERALLY throw myself off a cliff.”
Where you can find them: Working from home.
4. The Political Junkie
“Do you have any idea how the cost of these games is going to impact Russia’s economic future for years to come? Do you?!”
Where you can find them: In the office kitchen arguing with the Hardcore fan.
5. The Child
“Mom, when’s this going to be over?”
Where you can find them: Eating paste in a corner.
6. The Person Who Celebrates by Drinking
“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a PATRIOT.”
Where you can find them: Getting thrown out of the bar. At 1PM.
7. The Hater
“I would rather eat mac with no cheese than talk about the Olympics with you.”
Where you can find them: Re-watching House of Cards.
8. The No-Spoilers Person
“I was actually working all day, so DO NOT TELL ME WHO WON ANYTHING.”
Where you can find them: Wearing blinders until they get home to catch up.
9. The Uber-Patriot
“Do you remember when America invented freedom? And won all the gold medals? Good.”
Where you can find them: Commenting on Reddit.