1. On getting ready for a business meeting
Don’t let them sense weakness.
3. On justifying bad decisions
Whatever helps you sleep at night.
5. On being unemployed
I’m a professional internet thief, and that’s my outlet you’re looking at.
8. On surviving the workplace
And none of them can properly use Google Docs.
12. On Friendship
Two can keep a secret if one of them is dead. Remember that.
16. On dealing with co-workers
Yes, do tell me more about your weekend spent antiquing, in great detail.
17. On public transportation
Especially if its the L train.