26 Things That Make Rachel Wells My Favorite Person

It's Dodd's birthday! Time to celebrate YOU! Or: How Sunaina learned she needs to figure out what grammar is.

26. You're Pretty

Let's just get this one out of the way before shit gets real, okay? You are beautiful!!! You have these poetic, soulful eyes like the dogs in all those commercials for Sarah McLachlan's suicide hotline. THEY PEER INTO THE VERY DEPTHS OF MY BEING, RACHEL! .....and sometimes....when we're having a good time...your eyes begin to stray laterally a lil bit....and for a moment, the world stops. Are you looking at me, or the person next to me? I. can't. tell. It is the sexiest lazy eye that has ever made me question my identity.

25. Like, Really Pretty

There is a 1:1 ratio of serious pictures to silly pictures on your facebook, and this is why we are best friends. You are so incandescently, perfectly comfortable with being your real, true, honest self and can I get an AMEN to that?!!

24. You can make the best out of the worst situation

Remember senior year when your laptop's keyboard stopped working entirely? Did you buy a new laptop? HELL NO. What are you, a n00b??? (Am I using n00b correctly?) Instead, you began carrying a mouse and a keyboard with you everywhere you went! Sometimes, I would walk down into my living room to find you had let yourself in, made a spot 'o' tea and set yourself up on my couch. It was incredibly amazing to me. I mean, you basically crafted a portable desktop computer by combining only the worst parts of both the laptop and desktop computer systems. AND YOU MADE IT WORK.

23. You Are Into Spirit Animals

Not really, but you did hang out with me and waste an almost unbelievable amount of time in Caruth's 3rd floor study lounge, remember? We would "study" and also discuss important things like spirit animals. I think you made me a panda because at first I seem adorable and then you get to know me and I am "a vicious spawn of Satan." And even as I type that, I am so incredibly moved by how thoughtfully you chose it. I love you.

22. You are a poet and you most certainly know it

YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE YOUR POETRY RACHEL! It is the overlord to my robot brain-kingdom of non-poetic, normal thoughts. (I am not a poet.) Your poetry makes me dooo shit, Rachel. Exhibit A: There is probably no greater reason I had for pledging Omega Zeta (Sisterhood? ...Sure.) than that sad, pathetic night in the Caruth 3rd floor study lounge where you showed me all your depressing poetry about how you wanted Sahar, Dodd, and I to pledge with you. Like your poetry can effing guilt-trip THREE PEOPLE into spending TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS PER SEMESTER FOR FOUR YEARS to hang out with you. That's some impressively strong command of language you got there.

21. You Take Care of Me

Don't I look incredible in this picture? Fan-freaking-tastic. I know it. You know it. The WORLD knows it! And guess who curled my hair that night? YOU DID!! I know this one seems entirely about me (It is very much about me.), however this is a very important thing about you that I love. In a world where my other best friends (*cough* Dodd, Sahar *cough*) can barely take care of themselves (One set an electric teakettle aflame with the fire of a thousand suns. The other left her eggs on the stove and went to class to gift me the joy of walking into a house smokier than the moors of England), I really appreciate that you have any higher functioning capabilities at all. AND *~~EVEN BETTER*~~ YOU HAVE SO MANY!! You can sing Adele to me, you can take care of dogs AND cats that I find on the street, you can lecture me about my inability to properly care for things I find on the street, and much much more! Also, you look incredible in this picture, too.

20. You Are Good Humored

Your name is Rachel, if I haven't already made that clear. However, if I chose to call you 'Wonky Eyes' or call a very specific part of you 'Harlem,' you just give a jolly ol' belly laugh like Santa and keep chuggin' along. Why do you let me make fun of you? Oh, right, because I'm hilarious. (You also put up with my bloated self-esteem, bless your heart.)

19. You Dive In

Like Rachel Dodd, who is also much more Indian than I am, you too are more Indian than me. I speak Hindi and look vaguely Hawaiian. YOU LIVED IN INDIA FOR A FULL YEAR. This was very brave and exciting. First, India is very far away (did you know that?). Second, while you didn't know the language or very much about the culture, you dove in full-force and made such a beautiful impact on your students! YOU SAVED A LIFE! I have never truly saved an actual life and I am in medical school. You set up a fancy wonderful choir! You dealt with the random holiday breaks that you didn't know were coming with such grace. If someone told me 'Hey, sorry school's closed this weekend. Better find a place to stay in a country where you know nobody HAHA!' I would have crawled in a corner and died of anxiety. You found a kind lady to feed you and take you in! You were also hospitalized for an illness and told me it 'Really wasn't a big deal, Sunaina.' Basically, you're a fearless boss with an unstoppable amount of positivity. You go with the flow, and I invent one of those wave machines like they have at Sea World to manufacture a fake flow that I can then pretend I'm going with but really knew was coming all along. Obviously I admire this about you.

18. You Sing Like Effing Pavarotti

Seriously. You know this is true because I have literally drooled when you've sung to me. Your angelic voice is almost as great of an achievement as your middle school powerlifting accomplishments. Which are extensive.

17. YOU DON'T SMELL EVER NO REALLY THIS IS IMPORTANT

You are clearly sweating in this picture, Rachel. I'm sorry...... 'glistening.' It's India, it's summer, I get it. But I can guarantee you with 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000% certainty you smell like freaking jasmine flowers and incense and yes I am being racist here. HOW DO YOU NOT SMELL EVER? I think the makers of deodorant need to know. Also: why do you still wear deodorant? Just thought about how that's kind of weird. You obviously are made of some sort of superior human meat God forgot to shove down the rest of our people-shaped sausage casings because while you at worst smell like a toddler that has been running in a field of roses, I am wearing military-grade MEGAMAN antiperspirant and I still am afraid to raise my arms lest a swarm of locusts flies out from beneath them and kills everyone I love with the putrid stench that is my human body smell. (......I can't fix that run-on. I'm sorry. Nothing can fix that run-on.)

16. You Are Emotional

I think that word has a bad rap. You just really feel things, Rachel. Like sometimes you cry because you WANT A DOG. And it worked because that puppy is yours now, way to go!! Don't ever stop being vulnerable because it is magnificently difficult for most people and it is an incredibly powerful quality to have. As for me, I'll just continue to yell my way through life. It's worked okay. RIGHT, RACHEL???

15. You Love Yourself

HOW META IS THIS PICTURE????? A Rachel loving another Rachel. Maybe I *am* a poet? Anyways, you make an active choice to love yourself and that is really hard. I think a lot of us forget to think about our own needs and feelings and instead put other people first all of the time. However, you always take a moment to step back and check in with yourself, which is something I've learned from you! I can only study diarrhea for so long before I need to self-reflect. And most of the time I discover maybe it's time to set my diarrhea books aside and have a little me party! I LOVE ME PARTIES! Thank you for that.

14. You Love ME

Which...is hard.

13. You Are Compassionate

This is IMPORTANT RACHEL. Are you listening? LISTEN. You are so compassionate and filled with love for all people. My default setting is to hate and distrust everyone until they can convince me there is any reason I shouldn't think they will murder me in my bed. You will love someone up until the point they shit directly on your face. BUT THAT'S THE THING RACHEL! No one shits on your face! Ever! Because they are so blinded by your unconditional love and kindness that they can't see it in themselves to be anything but faithful to you. What I'm saying is, if anyone I know could start a successful cult, it would be you. So you should definitely get on that. Preferably a cult that is super into getting their flu shot because people are dying, Rachel!

12. You Are So Fun to Photograph

More on this later. Just let it sink in here.

11. You Have Good Taste In Music

So we can take picz like this one at concerts for the rest of our lives!!!

10. You Are Going Places

You know what you want and what you don't want, and even though you're not entirely sure where that's going to take you precisely, I am extremely confident wherever you end up and whatever you end up doing is going to be impressive and unique just like you!! And if you doubt that, take a sec to re-read this list asshole because I've worked really damn hard on it. AND DON'T PISS ME OFF BY DOUBTING YOURSELF AGAIN.

9. YOU ARE FULL OF LIFE AND ENERGY

How is it that your smile makes my heart sing? Like, other people have to at minimum laugh before I can even imagine a time where I will feel compassion for them. And, honestly, once most people laugh, it's over for me because their laughs are highly annoying. YOU JUST BEARING YOUR TEETH MAKES ME HAPPY. Process that for a second. And then your laugh, oh your laugh. It's like a thousand babies giggling in a sea of rainbows! This is a lot of sentimentality for me so appreciate it before it's over.

8. You Push Me Out of My Comfort Zone

Or rather, you force me to stop being such a G.D. douche all the time. You are very good at using your kindergarten teacher voice on me to make me reassess my actions. "Now, Sunaina, how would you feel if Rachel Dodd called YOU a pile of human garbage?" You're so right. All the time. Are you an angel from the heavens sent to curtail my cantankerous ways? You are so perfect, and I am not, and that is why together we are each HALF PERFECT. Never leave me.

7. You Are Forgiving

This was the cat from hell. You hated this cat...probably more than you hate boring people. You tried so hard to show this cat compassion, and in return it gave me the gift of this picture. I don't know if God just didn't have that many requests in his inbox that night, or if he was taking a break from preventing disease to smile upon me, but the holy moment when you picked up this Satanic cat, cradling it lovingly next to your face, smiling, as I raised my camera to take your picture will forever be burned in my memory. Your smile and forgiving love quickly turned to raw, honest fear. PRAISE JESUS that I was blessed enough to capture this moment. Did I say I love you yet? Because I love you. Especially since I know you hate this picture but as you're SO FORGIVING, you're going to forgive me for posting it on the internet anyways!

6. Speaking of Forgiveness...

DWIGHT!!!! You hate that I think you look like Dwight from The Office in this picture! Which, I should remind our audience, was taken at a time when The Office wasn't a piece of shit show.

5. You Are Thoughtful

If I wanted to have a deep meaningful conversation about life, death, religion, or taxes, I would definitely call you for 75% of those things. You are just SO SMART and SO THOUGHTFUL. You force me to think critically, and you push me to see other points of view. EVEN MORE AWESOME: we are usually also either napping or drinking while doing this, so really you are an excellent multi-tasker.

4. You Are Sexy

Remember when I said you let me photograph you? Well after a while you run out of faces and begin to improvise with your natural MUSK INDUCE WOMANHOOD. Rawr.

3. You Definitely Kept This Thing Going

The foursome would have been defunct had you not intervened with your aforementioned poetry. Our lives are intricately intertwined thanks to you. ALSO CREEPY: You saw me perform at a speech tournament in high school before we were best friends! So, I think it might've been destiny that we crossed paths again in college. Who would have known that the girl Sahar and Dodd kept talking about all the time ("She's so great! You have to meet her! She has this cat blanket and she doesn't even like cats!" "...Wow...she sounds...awesome...") would be one of my favorites? If we hadn't spent those hours in the coffee shop flipping through pictures of male models and discussing if we would or would not, in fact, [INSERT THE SECRET PHRASE HERE], my life would never have turned out so great. I LOVE YOU OKAY GET OVER IT.

2. YOU'RE A BAMF

No need to explain.

1. You Are the Center of the Universe

And I am not.