Guys listen up.
Adding some male perspective here - I’m no professional, but I have been in a long distance relationship for 3+ years (with no end in sight… sigh). I’ve come to realize that it is all about selfishness. If you’re selfish, it’s not going to work. If you consistently put your wants and needs before the other persons, it’s not going to work. If you don’t tell the other person how you really feel, it’s not going to work. If you try to live a relationship where you don’t allow the other person to have a life or develop into the person that they want to become even though they live hours (continents) away, it’s not going to work. If you don’t make an effort to listen, it’s not going to work. Believe me, after 3 years of long distance I’ve come to realize that it’s not a 50/50 trade off - sometimes you have to stop being selfish and go the extra mile. My girlfriend texts me 100x more than I text her, I visit her 10 times more often than she visits me, she makes the effort to call me or write me way more than I do for her. But we don’t keep score. We each do what we are able to make this work. If you really love and respect the other person you can make it work. Sure, there are days were it will be tough: days where you’d give anything to be able to fall asleep beside them, days where you ask yourself “has this all been worth it?”, and days where you physically can’t bring yourself to text the other person because it will make you miss them even more and you just can’t deal with it right now (this is a real thing btw). But don’t give up. Never give up, because the next time you get to hold your significant other in your arms and squeeze them just a little too tight; the months spent apart will all be worth it. I promise.
StevenH92 Steven. Student, traveler, environmentally friendly, varietist, eleutheromania, nationalist. Steven.
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