I Know I’m A Fatty When…

(Yes, I really ate that much.)

1. I eat a whole sleeve of Oreos

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2. Devour a whole bag of chips

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3. Go to town on a can of Pringles

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4. Finish off the guacamole

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5. Eat. All. The Wheat Thins

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6. Make off with all the mini donuts

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7. Opt for the supersize

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8. Don’t leave a single fry at the bottom of the bag

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9. Double down on a, erhh, Double Down

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10. Eat the whole pizza by myself

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11. Get extra bacon

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12. Lick the plate clean

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13. Make a drunk run to Taco Bell

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14. Consume all the candy

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15. Have my cake

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16. And eat it too

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17. Get an extra slice of pie

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18. Polish off a pint of ice cream

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19. Oh who am I kidding, it was totally 2

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20. But it’s OK because I just had one of those days

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21. And I needed it

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22. And you know what?

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23. I’ll totally work out tomorrow

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24. And hit the gym extra hard

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25. To work off all those extra calories

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26. Because that’s what I always tell myself, right?

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27. Right!

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