1. We don't understand why you always order sweet and sour chicken.
2. But nothing is as soul-destroying as when you order omelette and chips from the English section of the menu.
3. We will never understand why you touch the hot plate after we've warned you it's hot.
4. And everyone seems to burn themselves on the hot towels.
5. No one in the back is eating what you are.
6. If you can't use chopsticks, just ask for a knife and fork.
7. No, we can't teach you to use them.
8. We spend the end of every shift cleaning up noodles from the floor.
9. The beautifully crafted vegetable flower on your plate might have been on someone else's first.
10. No, you can't have more free prawn crackers.
11. The sauce you're eating probably has tomato ketchup in it.
12. Soy sauce stains.
13. Don't bother ordering rice if you're having a chow mein.
14. If you're ordering a snack to take away, salt and pepper chicken wings are your best bet.
15. And if you want to avoid getting oil everywhere, stay away from the prawn crackers.
16. Please don't try to be funny or cute when ordering the bill.
17. New Year's Eve is the worst night to work.
18. No, you don't have to be Chinese to work here.
19. We're really good at napkin origami.
20. We hate shredding duck in front of you.
21. And even though our hair always smells like prawns, we love our job.
