9 Lessons From The 2014 Eurovision Song Contest

Let's hope the participating countries learn from these mistakes for the 60th edition in Austria next year...

Well after a week of singing, dancing, political voting and everything else in between, the 59th Eurovision Song Contest has come to a close, so what did the acts get so wrong and what they could learn for the 60th edition? Here are some of the lessons that participants could take note...

(Advisory note: some of the embedded videos may contain flashing images)

1. Don't ask for help on cake making in the lyrics

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Seriously, if you have no clue on how to bake a cake, look it up on cook books, mobile/tablet apps or online. Alternatively, why not ask Buranovskiye Babushki (AKA the 'Russian Grannies' from 2012) for cake baking ideas.

This finished 13th in the first semi finals for Latvia.

2. Have choreography fit the song, this wasn't it!

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

If you want a singer to have the perfect choreography from the dancers (those are the ones that usually fill the 'maximum six performers' rule), make sure it fits the song. Unfortunately for this 'Game of Thrones-est' song from Christina Scarlat, this was a mess, plus if you watch the video, some were out of sync.

And to feel like a red wedding in Game of Thrones, this finished last (16th) in the first semi finals for Moldova.

3. Make sure the song isn't confusing

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Hersi's song is titled "One Night's Anger" ...complete with an uplifting instrumental backing track. It was a bit incoherent for a song about anger. (On the plus side, brownie points for the guitar solo and back tattoo for the postcard).

This finished 15th in the first semi finals for Albania by the way...

4. Don't go OTT with the futuristic theme

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Seriously, just no! This finished 11th place for Lithuania (so close).

5. Don't have a messy instrumental ensemble

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

A solid band should flow together, but this was just a mess and (this is a memo for The Shin & Mariko) what's with the parachute? This finished in last (15th) place in the second semi-finals for Georgia.

6. Avoid being TOO SEXY!

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Poland is one of two countries returning to the Eurovision Song Contest (Portugal is another), and Polish state broadcaster TVP gave the programme a "12" rating over there, but this performance is anything but rated "12".

This finished in 8th in the second semi finals and 14th in the finals.

7. Just enjoy the show ...oh!

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

This entry from Russia finished 6th in the first semi finals and 7th in the finals, but recent events in Ukraine (including a planned referendum) got a lot of booing from the audience those nights (and for the record: Ukraine topped Russia in 5th place in the first semi finals and 6th place in the grand final with this entry).

Now you know it's getting political for this europe-wide music competition.

8. France, explain this...

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Sadly, one of the big 5 (as in the big 5 financial contributions to the contest along with United Kingdom, Germany, Spain and Italy), finished in last place with only 2 points (both were from Sweden and Finland) and we think we can see why...

9. Finally, learn from Austria

Eurovision/DR / Via youtube.com

Yes, women with beards may be a little strange, but this was how he/she won it complete with a powerful voice and convincing 13 countries to get top marks out of a total score of 290, take note rest of Europe.

SEE YOU IN AUSTRIA IN 2015!