44 Thoughts Everyone Has When Buying The Perfect Perfume

    How many tester strips is it acceptable to carry?

    1. My perfume is running out.

    2. I need a new one.

    3. Let me go online and find a new scent.

    4. I've heard great things about this one!

    5. Oh, the reviews aren't very good.

    6. What about this one, it's new.

    7. "A fresh scent with a burst of energy."

    8. Okay, but what does everyone say about it?

    9. It's too woody? WTF does that even mean?

    10. I think I actually need to smell these things myself.

    11. Just smile and nod. "No, I'm fine." What, do they think they know my personal preferences?

    12. Okay, there's too much going on. What's new? I want something new.

    13. Maybe I should have asked for help.

    14. Someone come back and ask if I want help. I'll be nice this time.

    15. Please?

    16. Ooh, I like this one.

    17. I'll hold on to the little bit of paper to remember which perfume smells better.

    18. What are these things even called?

    19. Tester strips? That sounds reasonable.

    20. Right, back to smelling stuff.

    21. Ew, gross, so glad I didn't spray that on ME.

    22. Oh this one's nice. I'll hold this strip in my left hand in between my index and middle fingers.

    23. This one isn't half bad.

    24. Fuck, I've run out of fingers, could I put this somewhere else?

    25. Left trouser pocket. I'll leave it sticking out so the smell doesn't rub off on me.

    26. Okay, this one can go in my right trouser pocket.

    27. Alright, this is getting silly now, let me just pick the best one.

    28. What was the second one again?

    29. I'll just ignore it.

    30. I've got one left, what's the price?

    31. But is it cheaper online?

    32. Let me check.

    33. I'm so glad this place has Wi-Fi.

    34. That reminds me, I'm nearly out of data. Do I need to get more?

    35. When does my contract month start again?

    36. Oh, it's cheaper online.

    37. Is that including shipping?

    38. But how long does it last?

    39. Oh, people have complained.

    40. But others say it lasts all day. That's amazing.

    39. WAIT, how does it smell on my skin?

    40. IT SMELLS BETTER ON MY SKIN!

    41. Okay I have to get this but I'll order it online when I get home.

    42. But first let me spray this all over myself.

    43. Actually not sure I have £40+ to spent on this liquid.

    44. I'll just buy it when I'm next in duty-free.