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    15 Reasons You're Not A Disney Princess

    Because you don't have a posse of woodland creatures to do your dirty work.

    1. Pocahontas effortlessly mastered windblown hair.

    You had your hair as an appetizer.

    2. Ariel made brushing her hair with a fork look adorable.

    You tried it and looked like this...

    3. Snow White passed out and was awoken with a kiss.

    You passed out and woke up like this.

    4. Mulan chopped off her hair to restore honor to her family.

    Your custom hairdo took dishonor to a whole new level.

    5. Alice outgrew a house from sampling a piece of cake.

    You became a house after Freshman year of college

    6. Cinderella's whip...

    Your "carriage."

    7. Cinderella is besties with birds.

    Your encounters with birds look more like this...

    8. When Meg goes for the kiss...

    When you go for the kiss...

    9. How Belle gets boys to dance with her...

    How you try to dance with boys...

    10. Jasmine's belly dance:

    Your belly dance:

    11. Ariel falls gracefully into her lover's arms.

    You trip when trying to make a dramatic exit.

    12. Pocahontas gracefully wades into the water.

    You prefer a more original entrance.

    13. Mulan is trained in combat.

    You are a professional flailer.

    14. When Ariel emerges from the water....

    When you come out of the water....

    15. How Snow White apologizes...

    How you apologize...