A Comprehensive Guide To Football By Someone Who Knows Absolutely Nothing About It

As someone who has never seen a full football match on television, I was asked to guess what some of the most common football terms mean. Here goes nothing.

1.

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It really means this.

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2.

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Wrong. What it really means is this.

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3.

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Nope, that's wrong. It actually means...

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4.

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Nope that's wrong. This term actually means...

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5.

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Wrong again.

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6.

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This is kinda right. A 4-4-2 is...

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7.

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Ummmm.....

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8.

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Nope.

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9.

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That is wrong too.

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10.

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It has nothing to do with ITV gameshows.

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11.

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Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

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12.

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Half a point.

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13.

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Half a point.

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14.

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A quarter of a point.

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15.

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A tenth of a point.

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16.

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*Sigh*

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