Where you grew up was ace. A perfect place to grow up.
1. Bar the fact that you can’t watch anything online.
3. Or stream anything on Spotify.
“Connection lost. Reconnecting…” (it won’t)
4. Or be able to listen to a digital radio.
Signal? What signal?
5. Also, nobody knows where you live.
6. You can’t drive anywhere quickly.
7. Does your area ever make the news? Nope.
8. Not that there’s any news worth reporting anyway.
9. People where you live sound like this.
10. And their political views seem to come from the 1830s.
LOOK AT ALL THE IMMIGRANTS FLOODING IN.
11. Wherever you look people read the Daily Mail.
12. Locals don’t want to give young people anything.
13. And when I say anything, I mean anything.
14. ANYTHING. The locals don’t allow ANYTHING.
15. So the teenagers hang out here instead*
*because there is nowhere else to go.
17. Before you know it, it’s the weekend.
And the town is absolutely banging.
You could go to the local pub!
18. But it is full of people twice your age who will make you feel spectacularly awkward.
19. And the only entertainment is an unwinnable pub quiz box and a snooker table used by some people who WILL NOT FINISH PLAYING NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU WAIT.
“THIS time I will get to my 15 pound jackpot I CAN FEEL IT.”
20. You could go clubbing. This is however a…
21. When do the buses back to your parents end? Oh.
23. So what do you resort to doing every time you’re out? You ask your Mum pick you up at the club. You then lie all the way home.
You then proceed to vomit all over the floor of the car and tell your Mum that you must have eaten something “funny” for dinner.
But living the country isn’t all that bad! I mean, it is the place that you will always feel welcome.
It will never change, so it will always feel like home.
And it’s where, in the middle of the night, you can look up and see the absolute beauty of the stars above.
*this picture might be an exaggeration.
24. Haha jokes. At night the country looks like this.
Terrifying. Absolutely fucking terrifying.