24 Ultimate Vladimir Putin Gifts You Need In Your Life

Russia's multiple internet shops know you want to treat yourself with a Vlady gift.

1. Handmade Putin cushion

Handmade by bdeb.ru / Via bdeb.ru

'Cause sometimes you just want to cosy up with Vlady styled up as a Russian emperor.

2. Karate Putin action figure

statuetki.ru / Via statuetki.ru

You can get your own cute desktop Vlady for just 1480 roubles ($30).

3. Putin sauna mat

nika-sauna.ru / Via nika-sauna.ru

For when you want to see Vlady's face even during your private sauna time.

$19 at http://nika-sauna.ru.

4. Putin doll

KuklaPhoto / Via livemaster.ru

Bendy stuffed Putin for your mantelpiece.

5. Young Putin on a porcelain plate

apodarok.ru / Via apodarok.ru

For when you really need a porcelain portrait of Vlady.

This exact plate costs 180 000 roubles, $3600.

6. Or this more affordable one

vintajj.ru / Via vintajj.ru

A more recent photo but at least it's just 1000 roubles ($20).

7. These incredibly expensive amber mosaic portraits

Balt Amber / Via baltamber.ru

The one on the left is 35 х 45 cm and costs about $455.

The one on the right is 50 х 60 cm and costs $575.

8. Putin made from exotic butterfly wings (yes, really)

Mir Babochek / Via mirbabochek.ru

This $800 portrait is a collage made from exotic butterfly wings. What?

9. Pop art Putin carpet - when one portrait is just now enough

imperialstyle.ru / Via imperialstyle.ru

*needs more Vlady*

10. Putin cufflinks

cufflink.ru / Via cufflink.ru

For a stylish Vlady fan.

11. Putin jewellery box

rusvelikaia.ru / Via rusvelikaia.ru

This tiny (12 x 9 cm) box is handmade and costs $580. You can use it to store your Vlady cufflinks.

12. Badass Putin clock

rusvelikaia.ru / Via rusvelikaia.ru

Sunglasses Vlady is captioned with "The weak are beaten" on this impressive modern clock. You'll be reminded of the rules in thsi cruel world every time you check the time. You're welcome.

13. Van Helsing Putin passport cover

olga-pchelka / Via livemaster.ru

Intimidate the hell out of everyone who dares to ID you. The caption in Russian says "Evil will be punished".

14. Putin vodka gift box

rusvelikaia.ru / Via rusvelikaia.ru

This first aid kit contains a bottle of vodka and three shot glasses with Vlady portraits. Handy.

15. Putin plug

Amznfx / Via etsy.com

3D printed, NSFW, and not an actual sex toy - limit your pleasure to visual one, please.

16. Putin wine glass

Pavel Ztakan Zaicev / Via livemaster.ru

To cheers in style.

Na zdorovie.

17. Putin ring

KrymNash / Via livemaster.ru

If you're wondering about the weird shape Vlady's face is placed on - it's Crimea, a part of Ukraine that Russia annexed in 2013. Wearable politics!

18. Putin's face in plastic

Maxim Vorobyev / Via livemaster.ru

What do you mean "Wtf"? It's a 10 cm Vlady's face you can carry around with you.

19. Action Putin Fishing

etoday.ru / Via etoday.ru

Topless and manly. Put one on your desk to intimidate Annoying Chris from legal.

20. Putin art

Natalia Lvova / Via livemaster.ru

Done in the Russian flag colours, obviously.

21. Putin memory stick

Vladimir Woodflash / Via livemaster.ru

You own handmade wooden USB Vlady for 8 GB.

22. Bear-riding Putin sweatshirt

On-Trend / Via livemaster.ru

Wear this when you really want to make the most of your first impressions.

23. Action Putin on a bear

http://путин-на-медведе.рф/ / Via http://путин-на-медведе.рф/

Topless Vlady on a bear. Use it as a paper press in your office

And finally...

24. Putin soap

SoapAroma / Via livemaster.ru

When you love Vlady so much you want to lather yourself in his face.