You might have noticed media sources reporting this tech bro in a black hoodie hacked Ashley Madison.
Allegedly, he hacked the website and then tied up the data with rope.
I was disturbed to learn that this wasn't his first big hack.
In fact, this hacker has been at it for a LONG TIME.
Sometimes he wears cool sunglasses, but it's clearly STILL HIM.
ThinkStock alone has hundreds of pictures of this hacker. You can often find him hacking at his desktop.
He also knows how to hack using a tablet, which is impressive because it's really hard to type on those things.
He actually HATES using tables.
He often hides behind numbers.
He does have some weaknesses; for instance, he thinks you can shove dollar bills at a computer screen to pay for stuff.
He always leans in super close to his computer, a sure sign of his poor eyesight.
Sometimes he shines a flashlight on his computer? Again, I don't think his eyes work right. Probably from all the hacking.
Enough is ENOUGH. In order to speed up the search to find this infamous hacker, I went ahead and drew a police sketch. You are WELCOME.
Watch out for the hacker. And remember, never leave your wallet next to your computer where a hand can smash through the screen and grab it.
