12 Christmas Presents For Someone That You'll Never Ever EVER Bone

    For friends who are close enough to give each other presents but not close enough to kiss.

    Sarah Burton
    by Sarah Burton

    BuzzFeed Staff

    1. McDonald's Gift Card - $$$

    mcdonalds.com

    "We will never go on a date here."

    2. Poo-Pourri Pre-poop Spray - $9.99

    amazon.com

    Nothing says "stay away from my butt" better than a reminder we all poop.

    3. 3-Piece BFF Necklace - $8.99

    amazon.com

    Just to be clear that you're not only friends, but there is another friend of equal standing.

    4. Mouse Taxidermy Kit - $37

    afieldguide.org

    This will not bring out romantic feelings.

    5. J Crew Socks - $28

    jcrew.com

    Avoid if you suspect a foot fetish.

    6. Sitz Bath - $5.99

    amazon.com

    "Aids in relieving the discomfort of perinea conditions such as hemorrhoids, menstrual cramps, bladder or prostate infections!"

    7. Sorry! Board Game - $7.99

    amazon.com

    Assuming they want to be more than friends, this gets the message across.

    8. Lottery Ticket - $$$

    Ingram Publishing / Getty Images

    Only sometimes disappointing!

    9. "The Executioner" Mosquito Swatter - $19.99

    amazon.com

    Or any other pseudo-useful present "As Seen On TV."

    10. A Donation To Charity In Their Name - $$$

    Mitrija / Getty Images

    It doubles as a holiday gift to yourself in the form of a tax exemption.

    11. BFF Mixtape - $2

    Urs Siedentop / Getty Images

    Message received loud and clear.

    12. Vitamin D Tablets - $7.59

    amazon.com

    Not to be confused with that other D.