1. The mom in every group
They’ll probably strictly enforce the one glass of water per one drink rule. God love ‘em.
2. The poor souls who are still in relationships but vacationing solo
Wearing a face full of regret and discomfort. “I can look but not touch” is their mantra of the week.
3. The “I’m not drunk” drunk
This person will look you in your face and tell you they haven’t had that much to drink, even though you just witnessed them shotgun a beer directly after completing a keg stand. #SuchDenial
4. The fair skinned individuals
SPF 1,000 is their best friend.
6. The locals
They’ll be wearing the most fabric and sporting a disdainful frown. Stay out of their way.
7. The beach police
Remember that $20 is not a good enough bribe to get yourself out of trouble. When all else fails, cry.
8. The high school senior
This kid’s probably not quite ready to hang with the older crowd. It’s too much too soon.
9. The athletic gods/goddesses
There is no such thing as a friendly game of beach volleyball against these athletic marvels. Showoffs.
10. The old flirts
You know what I’m talking about. Old guys working their magic to hang out with the younger beach goers.
11. The wild ones
They’ll probably be eating their cereal out of a Solo cup and chasing it with a beer.
12. The frat daddies
They’re known for wearing ridiculous amounts of neon and showing off just enough man thigh in a nice pair of Chubbies.
13. The cougars
Having an empty nest can make a woman do some crazy things. 55 is so the new 25.