Flirty Spring Cocktails Even Though Spring Will Never Come

Drink one for fun or drink them all to forget how cold it still is.

1. Strawberry Basil Margarita

Denio Rigacci / Getty Images

This fruity favorite is perfect for spring! But it also tastes great during this unbearable, never-ending winter.

You'll Need:

• 2 cups of tequila

• 10 strawberries & 8 basil leaves

• 1 pitcher of disgusting grey slush from a street corner

Yes, by this time of the year, all that slush should be gone. But it isn't. When will spring come? Maybe never.

2. Pimm's Cup

Aurora Michele CC BY-ND / Via Flickr: photostilltheend

You’ll feel like you’re watching the finals at Wimbledon while sipping this classy British refresher. Actually, you won’t, because it’s still freezing outside.

You’ll Need:

• 1.5 oz Pimm’s No. 1 Cup

• Lemon and lime slices

Mix all the ingredients together using an icicle that is somehow still hanging from your roof.

3. Blueberries & Smirnoff Frosty

Peter Rowley CC BY Flickr: haemengine

Janmika / Getty Images

Take this drink outside and within seconds it will freeze into an alcoholic slushy despite the fact that it is March.

You’ll Need:

• Smirnoff Ice

• Blueberries (optional)

Stick a bunch of berries into a bottle of clear malt liquor (or don't). Then lug your carafe of forgetfulness onto your front lawn. DO NOT take your winter coat off – you’ll feel warm but that’s just hypothermia.

4. Whiskey Sour

david basulto CC BY-SA

Ingram Publishing / Getty Images

How? HOW??? How is it still winter?

You’ll Need:

• Too much whiskey

• A sour attitude

The ideal libation for a garden party. And if the weather won’t cooperate, perhaps there are other uses for that croquet mallet? Maybe the weatherman could use a good smashing. Yes…he must be smashed.

5. Effervescent Lime Pruno

Stephen Shankland / Getty Images

Chris CC BY-SA Flickr: phlyingpenguin

Apparently the “law” looks down on assaulting meteorologists with big wooden hammers.

You’ll Need:

• Toilet wine

• The memory of lime flavor

You may be reduced to drinking blindness-inducing alcohol made in a toilet, but by the time you get out it might finally be spring. Rejoice!