1. “I hope you’re actually paying attention to the road and not just staring at yourself again. You can’t afford another ticket.”
9. “You’ve turned me into a grumpy fluff, and I used to be such a cheery fluff.”
15. “You can’t see me back here, but I’m plotting something terrible.”
16. *”The Sound of Silence” plays in the background forever*
17. “HA, GOOD ONE, PAL. I AM A MOMENT AWAY FROM JUMPING ON YOU IN ORDER TO FREE MYSELF, BUT YOU KEEP THINKING THIS IS GREAT.”
Here Are The Top Stories
- A conservation group in Zimbabwe reported that Jericho, the brother of beloved lion Cecil, was shot and killed by a hunter. But some scientists monitoring the pride believe he is OK.
- Joe Biden has begun to "actively explore a possible presidential campaign," the New York Times reports.
- The trooper who pulled over Sandra Bland was disciplined for "unprofessional conduct" in the fall of 2014, records show.