12 Easy Versions Of The Hard New Years Resolutions You’re Realizing You Can’t Keep

We’re 9 days into the New Year and you’re already blowing it. Why not trade in the impossible resolutions you made, for some resolutions that you can actually do? Or don’t. I’m not going to tell you how to live your life you lazy jerk.

1. Hard Resolution: Drink Less Alcohol

Easy Resolution: Drink Less Alcohol In Front of Others And More All By Yourself

2. Hard Resolution: Get Your Degree

Easy Resolution: Watch The Entirety Of The Film Back To School

3. Hard Resolution: Get A New Job

Easy Resolution: Work Less At Your Current Job

4. Hard Resolution: Exercise

Easy Resolution: Talk More About How You Want To Start Exercising But Can’t Because Of An Old Sports Injury You Made Up

5. Hard Resolution: Get Out Of Debt

Easy Resolution: Trade Debt To The Mafia For A Favor To Be Named In The Future

6. Hard Resolution: Manage Stress

Easy Resolution: Stop Doing Things

7. Hard Resolution: Lose Weight

Easy Resolution: Scratch Out The Sizes On Your Fat People Clothes

8. Hard Resolution: Quit Smoking

Easy Resolution: Quit Smoking In Between Cigarettes

9. Hard Resolution: Save Money

Easy Resolution: Pull Off The Perfect Heist

10. Hard Resolution: Travel More

Easy Resolution: Take More Creative Naps

11. Hard Resolution: Eat Healthy

Easy Resolution: Eat One Giant Meal Once A Week

12. Hard Resolution: Volunteer

Easy Resolution: Write Buzzfeed Articles

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