Thankfully for the rest of us, Gothamist has found the world's worst street performer. His name is Kalan and unsurprisingly he performs in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.
Kalan wears a lot of actual garbage. Also, warpaint.
And he travels around with a bunch of other actual garbage.
He also drinks out of the garbage.
Sometimes he runs around subway trains dressed kind of like a Jawa from Star Wars.
And sometimes he stands on trash cans and waves around a big tube.
He describes what he does as "a non-narrative, nihilist, anarchist puppet show about literary theory."
Pictured below: something apparently about literary theory.
Oh, and sometimes he'll touch you with his garbage puppets.
He's using a baby doll attached to his fingers to caress this man's leg.
Now he's using the same baby doll to touch the man's shoulder while blowing a harmonica in his face.