1.
Why do priests have to be so aggressive with the holy water blessings?
2.
Is there a "special Heaven" just for the people who only go to mass on Easter and Christmas?
3.
Why is the mass copy different every time I go to church?
4.
Are you trying to hint at something with all this sitting, then standing, then sitting, then kneeling?
5.
If we're not allowed to eat for an hour before mass, how are we supposed to pay attention as we slowly starve to death?
6.
Why were we introduced to the glory of red wine at age seven in a country where we couldn't buy it for another 14 years?
7.
Why was it okay to peg the occasional baptism onto mass without prior notice?
8.
Where do communion dresses go to die?
9.
Why can't a holy day of obligation count as church for the week?
10.
Was CCD just a way to introduce us to social awkwardness and anxiety?
11.
Can we contest penance?
12.
The Sign of Peace is really just a hand squeezing contest, right?
13.
Isn't it a little rude to make rosaries so pretty, but prohibit them as necklaces?
14.
What the hell is going on with teen mass?
15.
How come we don't get TV screens and coffee shops like the "cool" church down the street?
16.
Can we please talk about the dragon problem that so many saints had to deal with?
17.
How many church fires do Advent wreaths cause annually?
18.
You do know my dad is sleeping, not praying, right?
