• lol badge

21 Hilarious Tweets That Are Way Too Real If You Hate Doing Stuff

"I am never happier than when something I'm supposed to do is cancelled".

1.

I hate to cancel. I know we made plans to get together tonight but that was two hours ago. I was younger then, and full of hope.

2.

when you’re having a good time & definitely not dying inside

3.

your dating profile: i LOVE adventures me: sounds like i'd have to do stuff. next-->

4.

Sorry I'm late, just didn't want to come, so I was trying to limit the amount of time I'd be here. I'll leave early, too. Anyway what's up?

5.

What I meant to do: 1) 50 push-ups 2) 50 sit-ups 3) 20 minutes on a bike 4) 3-mile run What I actually did: 1) ate an entire cake

6.

7.

best part about making plans with people is canceling plans with people, then never having to see people

8.

No definition changes more as you get older than that of the word "party"

9.

"This is a mistake" -I whisper as I leave my house

10.

I know it's important to "put yourself out there," but here's my argument: what if it's annoying

11.

Top 5 Things I Want To Do Today: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

12.

Not to brag, but I couldn't if I tried.

13.

*minimizes window of opportunity

14.

If you could have dinner with any person, living or dead, what excuse would you use to bail at the last minute?

15.

16.

Who the hell has the time and energy to stalk someone? I'm barely even interested in what I'M doing.

17.

I am never happier than when something I am supposed to do is cancelled.

18.

as a kid, there really wasn't anything I wanted to be when i grew up. and boy have i nailed it.

19.

I never finish anything. I have a black belt in partial arts.

20.

*lays in bed for 12 hours I guess I'll get up now *walks over to couch & lays down

21.

i only ask people to hang out when i know they already have plans