29 Struggles That Only People With Big Butts Will Understand

I like big butts and I cannot find pants that fit right.

1. Dresses that fit on your top half feel completely insubstantial from the waist down. Normal length on model = micro mini on you.

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2. And pants that correctly fit your waist, hips, AND legs are a myth. Choose any two and buy a belt.

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3. You’ve spent several hours of your life in fitting rooms stuck in pants that won’t go up past your thighs.

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4. And when you do happen to find those perfect jeans, don’t get too attached. They’ll be gone reeeeal soon.

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5. So this concept – no matter how absurd – is actually very, very appealing to you.

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6. You spent all of high school and college leaking out of these awful chairs.

Is higher education worth these bruises?

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7. You’re always at risk of knocking things over without realizing it, for no fault of your own.

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8. People recognize you just as well from behind as they do from looking at your face.

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9. Your leggings are fine on your legs and completely see-through from stretching over your butt.

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10. Walking up stairs with someone directly behind you makes you profoundly uncomfortable.

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11. You can’t wear short shorts because your magnificent backside insists on peeking out of them.

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And if they do hold in your booty, they have no interest in holding your waist.

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12. For pets and BFFs, your butt is the best pillow available.

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13. And sometimes it doubles as a table as well.

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14. Having your friends compare your posterior to stars/planets/galaxies/wonders of the world is standard fair.

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15. You’ve heard this song sung to you more than you’ve heard your own name.

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16. Your underwear, no matter how low and how subtle, pretty much always makes an appearance.

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17. Group photos with your flat-assed friends always have one uncontested center of attention.

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18. And these cutesy couple photos end up highlighting the wrong couple altogether.

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19. Even if the rest of you is teeny tiny, sharing chairs with another person is out of the question.

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20. Catcallers, who are universally disgusting and loathed, save their worst behavior for you.

Disney / Via reddit.com
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21. You can only go so far when you try to squeeze through a narrow gap or go under your bed.

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22. A skirt or dress that’s the appropriate length in front is all sorts of revealing in back.

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23. If you decide to lean against a pole on public transportation, everyone’s commute gets a bit more awkward.

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24. Sitting = risking getting stuck in that chair forever.

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25. And biking = the painful revelation that bicycle seat makers never have and never will understand your needs.

MTV / Via favim.com
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26. Two-piece swimsuits where you can’t mix and match different size tops and bottoms? Haha, no thanks.

Billboard / Via glee.wikia.com
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27. Printed or brightly colored pants are off-limits unless you’re ready for a steady stream of “compliments” all day.

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28. Between all its calls and texts, your butt has a more active social life than you do.

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29. And, worst of all, if you ever try to complain, you’re reminded that a lot of people would love to have the assets that you were born with.

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So, hey. You may as well work it.

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